The Art of the Apology

I woke up this morning thinking about this, so I am sure I have to share with you. I lost a good friend this summer. She did not pass to the great beyond, but rather just ceased to exist in my realm of being.

I am a Democrat, born and bred. I have been known to support Republican candidates on more then one occasion, but for the most part I just support what ever or who ever I think is right and on the side of good. This has earned me the name in the family as "a flaming Liberal," but so be it. Back to my train of thought.

My friend is a Republican. Nothing wrong with that, just laying the groundwork for this missive. Republicans have the right to live also, (Hi Joe!) The problem arises when we talk politics, so I tend to avoid that at all costs. I change the subject, I walk away, just whatever it takes, but...

We live in a computerized world and in that world is the forwarded email! No need to even think, just click forward, forward, forward. Now I open most of my email because I think there may be a message in there somewhere. So when the health care debate came to the forefront, my mail box was filled with how Obama is getting ready to have all the old people euthanized, and me being an old person, should immediately write my senator and yada, yada, and you know the routine.

That part is not important, what is is the fact that I asked her not to send this stuff. I forwarded it back to her. I asked her not to, but she continued, so I blocked her and sent her a letter telling her why. I was truly offended.

Then came the apology: "Dear Lou, I am very, very sorry I offended you, but you need to know what the Democrats are trying to do. You need to know that ..." and she continued in that vein, explaining to me what I am to simple minded to understand.

So on to the art of the apology. People have feelings. People have thoughts. People just want to live. If you step on someones toes in your quest for the good life, apologize and back off. "I am sorry." "I am sorry I offended you." "I am sorry I pissed you off." Stop there at the period. Do not say, "I am sorry, but you know you are wrong!" "I am sorry, but you are stupid and need to be educated."

Just "I am sorry." That is if you are sorry. Sorry you hurt me, not sorry I am of a different belief. A heartfelt apology will go a long way toward building bridges. I am a very stubborn person and left a church I had attended for 15 years for the lack of an apology.

So just love each other, mend your bridges and try not to piss me off, cause I carry a grudge and you need to know that going in!!