Let's just give some thought to this circle of life thing here>

It is a stretch to see how that tiny little happy baby over there on left, turned into this old woman here on the right.  No one is more stunned by that transformation then I  am.  That little baby there is pure and innocent and knows nothing at all about the causes this woman holds dear.  But if you stop and think, my mother was once a tiny baby like that.  All I remember was when I was little life was so easy. I never had to worry about a place to live or food to eat or being warm or anything.  All my decisions were made for me.  I did not even have to wear shoes and clothes were just something we put on because we were supposed to do that.

Then my sister got married and then my brother joined the Army and I started high school and I figured out there were boys.  But the most fun was finding cigarettes!  Thanks for that LaVeta!  Oh, and the Home Brew.  You kids today missed all the good stuff! 

"I belong to the Beat Generation.  Ain't nothin' troublin' my mind.  I belong to the Beat Generation, and everything's goin' just fine!"

Do not remember what that was about, but it rears it's little head sometimes in my memory.  I knew there were drugs out there and I knew the names of them at the time, but alcohol was my drug of choice along with Pall Mall cigarettes.  And can only thank God that he kept me away from the drug scene.  Sure was not any good sense on my part, I just was not interested.  This was all at Nickerson High School.  We later moved to Hutchinson in my senior year and that was the end of my formal schooling.  Take a lonely little country girl and throw her into the mainstream of a big city school and you will lose her every time.  And so it happened with Louella Bartholomew.

And so life went on pretty much without me.  I fell in love, I got married, I had 4 babies in 4 years, I took a 4 year break and had another one.  I divorced, I married, I worked, divorced, married until that one sounded like a broken record.  And then one day I realized that my kids that had been the whole reason for living and working were now marrying, leaving and having babies of their own.  I was a grandma.

And now those babies are having babies and I am a great grandmother.  There is a very good chance that I will be a great, great grandmother before I get out of this mess.  There was a point in my life that I dreaded growing old.  A time when I thought it could not happen to me.  You know what I mean?  Well, I have to be honest here and tell it like it is.  Vini, Vidi, Vici!  I did that!  I can not think of anything in this world that I wanted to do that I did not do.  

I ran away, and I came back.  I have ridden motorcycles,  and drag raced after midnight.  I have ridden horses that no one knew about.  I have fished and hunted, hiked and boated.  I have loved and laughed and had my heart broken more then once, but I got what I gave.  I have been rich and I have been poor.  I have held a newborn baby kitten and held people as they died.  I have heard angel wings when a soul leaves the body, but only once. 

When I was young, I had the fire in my belly, but now I have the fire in my soul.  And I guess that is how the circle of life goes.  Someday I will need to set by the fire and nod as the kids take care of me.  I was once the carefree little girl and then my children were and now it is their children.  And that dear people is the circle of life as I know it.  When I was that tiny baby up there, my great grandmother was the Matriarch of the family, and now, alas, it is me.  I always thought the Matriarch was to be revered and respected, but now I find myself in the postition of being Matriarch and I find it is just a word I am not sure I spell correctly.  I am the same person I was before someone died and left me in charge.  I am still confused by the events of my life and am in no way able to advise anyone else.

So here is the deal; we are born, we grow up.  Some of us have kids some of us don't.  Some of us are happy, some are not.  Some of us are rich and succesful and some of us are not.  It all boils down to this, we all put our britches on one leg at a time. We all love some body at some point and when it is all said and done we are a light that gets put out.  I like to think that I am important and that I have made a difference.  This is what I know; when my light goes out, some will mourn for a time, but life goes on as it will.  Some one else will look in the mirror and say, "Oh dear, this leaves me as the Matriarch!"

That, my friends, is the Circle of Life!