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Monday, September 5, 2011

Oh, is the country life really for me?

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My head is pounding.  My eyes are bagging.  My poor neck is stiff and I am going to shoot the neighbors!  Why do people get dogs, just to listen to them howl?  My dogs are here by my feet looking up at me with adoring eyes.  Last night they were in my bedroom.  One was in her crate cause she has bad habits.  The other was on the floor by my head snoring.  On the other hand, the people who are directly Southwest of my bedroom and only about 500 feet away were busy sleeping while their dog howled at the moon and was answered by the dogs who live right East of me. 
See last night when I went to shut up the geese I heard dogs in the field behind me.  They were barking at me.  Scared me so I hurried back in and locked the door.  I do not know if they can open doors or not, but I take no chances!  I always worry that something will want me.  Hasn't bothered me so far in my journey through life, but you just never know when a lunatic may cast his eyes upon me and lose control!  Hey!  It could happen.
So we came in and since it was dark, we got ready for bed.  Now I sleep with my bedroom window wide open!  Nights are cool here in Colorado and this makes for some good sleeping.  Or it should.  But not if the other people in my world are inconsiderate oafs!  I live in the middle of my own little acre and there is an empty acre West and more South. This should tell you that my neighbors are not real close there. Ah, but a doggie voice can carry for miles on the night air!  And the fact that the neighbors East have probably a total of  9 dogs makes for a situation that might drive me mad. 
First the dog that I had never heard bark, so he must be new over there.  And big, I might add, if his bark is any indication.  He barked several times and the 9 answered.  Then he howled.  That seemed to really get their attention!  Now, have you ever tried to sleep with a howling cacophony of beasts of all sizes and shapes?  And just as I would start to drift off, the leader would remember that he was outside, alone and wanted someone to come and pet him.  So that is how I spent my night.  My dogs were very quiet and complacent in that they felt no need to add to the melee. For that I was grateful.
And then about 4:30 AM my little eyes popped open and it was very quiet.  I think that is what woke me up!  Complete silence except for the occasional chirp of a cricket.  Now the key here is I was now awake.  I could have lain there for hours, but when I wake up, I get up.  I do not fall back asleep.  Oh, I will when I set down in the recliner to watch the news or Jeopardy! but not while I am laying there in my bed in my jammies with the sun thinking about coming up.  I do some of my best work in the wee, wee hours.  So, I get up and make my coffee and listen intently for the dogs.  They have all apparently worn themselves completely out, because there is nary a sound.
Now, I can devote myself to thinking about how I could possibly get even with those jerks over there with the howling dog.  I at one point in time had a spotlight that would light up the hillside a mile or so away.  I am going to look in the top of the garage because I think that is where I put it when I burned a hole in my doily with it.  I am going to find it and mount it on a pole out there and point it at their bedroom window.  I will plug it in to a sensor box so every time their dog barks the light will come on for just a few seconds.  I am telling you that thing is bright!  If I leave it on, my meter will explode and if it doesn't it will burn all the vegetation between here and there.  So it shall be internittent.  That should do it.
Ok, enough of my tale of woe.  It is a new day.  No dogs are barking.  I will go let my geese out and then cook me an egg or two.  Then I shall stroll up the road to see my step daughter and pick up some stuff she has that needs altered.  When I get home, I will set in my recliner and catch Who Wants to be a Millionaire? and if I happen to drift off, well that is just the breaks of the game.  Not like I have anything to do today, since it is Labor Day and the last holiday of the summer season.  Someone will call me later and invite me over because they are having a cook out and I am always hungry.  And I am always fun!  Or at least I am when I get my good nights sleep.
Caio!  (Did I spell it right?)

2 comments:

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girl said...

You are such a trip, the stuff you say, but you should never go outside alone like that take something to protect you with and yes they would even want you, You have such a devious mind but with the lights go for it and let them know what your going through with them dogs barking

Another year down the tubes!

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