Anyone remember this picture? I sure do. That was 40+ years ago when I was a single mother raising 5 kids. No problem. A piece of cake. Go to work, come home, take care of the kids, cook clean, homework, fishing on the weekends and maybe church on Sunday. I was young and the world was before me. I never dreamed for one moment that 40 years later I would be second guessing the job I did shaping these little minds and preparing them for the world ahead. If I had thought of that angle I would have ran down the road screaming. But I did not. I simply went about the every day tedium of life and that was that.
I do not have a picture of my ex-husband, the father of this brood, but suffice it to say he was a drop dead gorgeous Adonis, smart, witty, generous to a fault, but alas, we both had our faults and so a divorce was inevitable. While I was tending to life in Hutchinson, Kansas, he set up his empire in Western Kansas. We shared the kids as we chose to without benefit of the courts system. Sometimes they were with me, sometimes with him. The point being, they reached adulthood and began making their own decisions. Far be it from me to say I approved of some of those decisions or even that I understood where they were coming from when they announced them to me, but nonetheless, they were in charge of their lives. The older girls were living with their father when I moved to Colorado, but I do drone on, don't I. That is all water under the bridge.
Earl Seeger passed at 52 years of age. That was very young. The girls were all married by that time and had kids of their own. Sam was off in the world slaying dragons. And so our lives drifted until very recently. Last May 10, Dona Maries's son Joe was scheduled to graduate the next day, Mother's Day. He went to see a friend, rolled his car and has been in a coma since.
And now I have occasion to know exactly what my kids have become from their life lessons. Dona has been at his side since the accident. She has never wavered as she set by his bedside waiting for him to wake up. Patty and her girls are with her most of the time. Debbie and her husband visit regularly. There are no negative thoughts. God will take care of us through this, whatever this may be. Sam, ever my rock, has explained that this will be a very long process and has made a budget and is on top what must happen through the process. Sue and I set home and wait for updates. We all know what we are capable of doing and we do it the best we can.
But the most amazing part is the love that binds this family together has never been more clear or stronger. Life tends to let us drift apart, but upsets pull us back together. Is that how it should be? I do not know. I always dreamed of a touchy feely relationship, but this seems much better. We are all there for each other and we each know it. I strongly suspect that it has always been that way. Mother always said "You can choose your friends, but you are stuck with your family." I sometimes wonder if she was being sarcastic when she said that!
So here is Dona Marie with Joey and the therapist. Joey had been sitting in the chair for several hours and decided he wanted to stand up. The therapist told him he could not do that, but Joey with the Seeger/Bartholomew blood in his veins was clear about what would happen. And it did. Not once, not twice, but several times. Then they put him into bed and he went fast asleep. Dona, the middle child, who neither leads nor follows, is a bulwark for her son. After 3 1/2 weeks in a coma, he is now making rapid strides forward. I just got off the phone with Patty and Joey is very agitated and wants out of the bed. The best news is that he is angry. If he is angry, that is an honest emotion. That is good news.
And here is the family you saw at the beginning of this blog. I have added one more child since the first picture was taken. Bret is 22 years old and he seems to have the same good heart that the other 5 have. So, to make a long story short, I am thinking that when I am old and grasping at that slender little silver thread called life, that is a pretty good bunch to have on my side and I am very happy to call them my children. And I mean each and every one of them in their own unique way. I love each one with my whole heart and I love each one in a special way. And I think they love me. Or at least I hope so!
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