Last night the son and his chosen one started hauling their possessions up the stairs, out of the trailer, and the storage shed and packing it into Jerry's van. And then the trip to Florence and the new house began. You know, it is kind of sad to see this happen. Not because I will be alone, because I am a rather solitary person anyway, but rather because it marks the end of my child rearing days. Started that little chapter in 1962 and now in 20ll I watch the last little fledgling spread his wings and try it solo. The only difference here is if the baby bird does not make it successfully, it will plop to the ground and either die from the fall or a cat will come along and eat it. Not so with the human race.
I have friends that say, "Oh, he will be back." I do not think they understand. I do not want them back. Not because I do not like them. Nor because I want to live alone. Or because I finally have a complete room for my eBay stuff. I want them to succeed.
I want them to know the thrill of coming home at night after a hard day's work and turning their very own key in their very own door. I want them to know who mows the grass, who washes the dishes, who pays the electric bill, who buys the dog food. I want them to know the thrill of something called Independence. While I did not give birth to this little bird, I taught him to walk, I potty trained him, sent him to school, and tried to instill in him a sense of right and wrong, justice and equality, and all the things he needs to know about being kind to the lesser on the planet whether man or beast. I have tried to lead by example. They never did catch on to the Recycle thing or the healthy diet, but I can't win them all. Now we will see how that works out for me!
They did spend last night here, and that is what it was; the last night under Momma's roof. When they were getting ready to take the load to Florence, Amanda asked me, "Well, how do you feel? We are leaving. You will be alone. Are you going to miss us?" And I answered as best I could to this girl who has become like a daughter to me.
"As for being alone, we are all alone. I have been alone all my life. Sure I will miss you, but this is life and it is time. You kids need to build your own life. You can never be on your own here in my house. You need your own little corner."
She did assure me that they will come and visit every day. Well, every day that they work in the shop in Pueblo. Maybe not every single day, but most of them. Ah, the exhuberance of youth! Makes me remember back to the day when I was 19 years old and I looked up into a pair of the bluest eyes and knew I would never be alone again. I was wrong on that day and have been wrong many times since.
And when it gets right down to it, we are alone and we will always be alone. And such is life!