Did you ever have your tender little feelings hurt by something someone said? Or didn't say? I have been on the receiving end of both those scenarios. I have to say that I appreciate the former to the latter. When someone says something hurtful at least I know where I stand and honesty is, after all, the best policy. My momma drilled into my head that I must be honest under any given situation. And in all fairness, I learned early on, that a lie is hard to remember, so mostly I just stick to the truth because it is easier to remember. This works well in most areas of my life, except my marriages. Some times I shave off a couple, not because I am lying, but because a couple of them were not worth remembering. I call this my "lie of omission." Mostly when I divorced I took my previous name back because it matches my kids name. I went from being Louella Bartholomew to Louella Seeger. There was an Ivey, Bayless, Gonzales who all morphed into Lou Mercer. And that is who I am today many, many years later.
Much like Mae West, I never met a man I didn't like and that is true to this day. I have, however, not met a man that I felt like giving up my retirement check for to this day. I also love Black Walnut Ice Cream and Wintergreen Lifesavers, but I am not adverse to a big bowl of any kind of ice cream and Spearmint Lifesavers work well too. This just shows I am flexible!
There was a time in my life that I thought my given name was "stupid bitch". When I left that man and had 5 kids to support with no help from him nor the welfare system, I was 103 pounds of next to nothing with no self esteem. I had no life skills and no work experience except 3 weeks that I had worked at a laundry in either Garden City or Liberal. But I had a vision! I could see me someday in a home of my own and my kids would be fed and clothed. It was a dream I clung to and by sheer determination I made it come true. Granted, it was not the best house in town, but the roof did not leak and we were warm.
I worked for several months on the "shake table" at the Ineeda Laundry just up the street from my house. Nights I washed dishes at the Blue Grill down on South Main. It was there that I met a man named "shall remain nameless". He was a writer. My dream from the first day I held a Red Big Chief tablet and a lead pencil was to be a writer. Nameless and I were friends and he let me read a novel he was aspiring to publish. I knew I could do better! To make a long story short, he went on to be a news director at one of the local radio stations. We dated briefly, but since I had a nest full of kids and he was a "man about town" that did not work out well. I did run into him a couple years later and was amazed to see he had gone completely bald, was fat and still full of himself! Very glad I dodged that bullet!
Shortly after meeting him I discovered a lady who lived 3 doors down on 5th Street wrote for several of the "romance rags". True Confessions was her favorite source of income. It was from her that I learned that True Confessions and every other romance magazine was a figment of someone's imagination. They were all in the same form, woman meets man, man is not interested, man pursues woman and they kiss and then live happily ever after.
I look back on that period in my life and realize that nameless was part of what made me into who I am today even though he was only in my life a short time. He fueled me to write and journal and all the stuff that today is my salvation. I did google him a time or two, but found nothing. I at least published a book and collaborated on a second one. I still have visions of being a successful published author, but if that never happens, and chances grow slimmer every year, I am still happy with my life.
Mother always said "If you can come to the end of your life and count your friends on one hand, you are a very successful person." and I can! My friends are legion, my dreams are many, and with God at my side I may still conquer the world!
Here's hoping!
