First lucid thought of the day!

 Setting here with my first cup of coffee of the day and Sam Seeger and Richard Meyer pop into my head with  brief memory from long ago.  Sam was in Central High here in Pueblo.  Richard was a son-in-law of Kenny's.  Sam was probably a Sophomore at the time.  One of his subjects was the German language.  He would come in and spout off phrase he had learned in school that day and sometimes I could decipher it, which always surprised him.

Just a little background here.  My grandfather came into America via Ellis Island when he was 9 years old.  Most of my ancestors were fluent in the German language and at family gatherings the elders would converse in German, so I had a passing knowledge of the language.  My first husband was probably more German than I was.  When he proposed, he did so in German.  So, like I said, I knew a little German, but not enough to guide Sam through the language with any degree of competency.  Back to the story.

I had told Sam that Richard spoke German and I felt if he wanted to learn it would be nice to have Richard for supper and they could converse.  Sounded good to him so the invitation was issued and Richard accepted.  I told him Sam would be trying his German skills on him and he agreed to the plan.

The night arrived and supper was cooked and the table "laid".  Now "laid" was the term that the grandma's had always used for "setting the table." Grace having been said, conversation could begin.  Sam and Richard exchanged "Guten abens" and then Sam uttered something in German to which Richard replied with several sentences in fluent German.  Sam once more more replied in his halting German to which Richard replied with a fluency that I had not heard since leaving grandma's house.  Then the table fell silent except for the conversation between Kenny and Richard about the "job".  

Sam and I were cleaning the kitchen after and the men had gone outside to the garage, which meant Kenny had gone out to smoke his pipe and visit with Richard away from the domestic stuff inside.  

Sam began our discourse with "Good Lord!  You did not tell me how well Richard knew German!  I just made a complete ass out of myself and you let me!"

I replied that I thought the conversation had gone rather well to which he replied, "Oh, yeah!  It went well, but I do not think Richard gave a damn how fast Tom can run, or how far Mary walked to school!  You didn't tell me how well he knew German."

I asked him if he understood anything.  He replied that he did, but that was our one and only discourse.  He went on to go to the German club, I think and maybe learned a little German.  Since coming to Pueblo I am no longer around people who speak any German, except for my friend, Jerome.  

So, this is what is on my mind the very first thing this morning!  

Hope you all have a good day! 

Guten Auben. (I think that is right.)

What ever happened to Carol Mason?

 It is amazing how my mind works!  I lay in my little bed at night and think pretty thoughts and drift off to sleep.  Mostly I think about Jesus and contemplate the day I will get to go see him.  So why does my mind that is supposed to be asleep go other places and wake me up at 2:30 AM back at Hutch High?  And why is Carol Mason alive in memory just as clear as the last time I seen her?  Let me give you some back ground on my relationship with Carol.

I met her in her Senior year.  I was in my Junior year.  That was back in my "cool days."  I think she was in my Stenography class.  That is the one where we learned to take shorthand.  Not sure that subject is still taught at all.  Kind of like typing.  And cooking and sewing.  Those all used to be "life skills."

Carol lived with her Grandma on 9th Street (I think).  She was of Indian descent.  She had coal black hair and coal black eyes.  Her eye teeth were prominent and in this day and age an Orthodontist would have been all over her, but back then it was just cool.  Carol never got flustered.  She never hurried.  She never got flustered when boys looked her way.  She was just so damn cool!  She did not smoke and I never lit up near her.

She never walked fast.  Her eyes never seemed to leave the ground in front of her wherever she was going.  There was no world outside of her and I.  Looking back I can see that she was an introvert.  She never told me why she lived with her grandma, only that when she graduated she would go back to California.  I wanted to go with her, but she was adamant that I stay in school and graduate and that when I was through with school she would send me a train ticket and I would join her in California.  My life was planned.  I think her dad was in the service out there.

As we grew closer I learned more about her.  She had a boyfriend named Lee and they were to be married when she graduated and moved back to California.  As the day grew closer she became more nervous about the wedding.  One day she decided she should cook me a meal, much like the first meal she would serve to her soon to be new husband.  Life was so simple back then!

I arrived at grandma's house on the appointed day of the "first meal after the wedding day."  The table was set for two.  No grandma in sight.  Come to think of it, I only saw the grandma one time and that was just a fleeting moment.  

I was served my meal.  It quickly became apparent that Carol was not real domesticated in the kitchen department and that poor Lee was going to starve.  I looked at the fare and knew I could not survive on this and it was not going to suffice for a full grown working man.  It was a hot dog along side a spoonful of macaroni and cheese.  I looked at that miserable fare and then at Carol's expectant face.

"Well, what do you think?"  

I wanted to say something nice, but I was way to honest for that.  

"That poor man is going to starve to death!"  So we ate our humble fare amid bouts of laughter.  There was not even a second hot dog and dessert was non-existent.  But Carol was cool and I was sure Lee knew that.

She moved back to California after graduation.  We kept in touch and she sent me pictures of the wedding.  She still planned on buying me a train ticket for my graduation.  We wrote back and forth.  She got pregnant and gave birth to a still born baby boy.  I dropped out of school.  I married and had a daughter.  My dreams of California died easily, but the memory of Carol Mason, not so much.

I still think of her now and then and can picture her in my mind.  She was a loner.  I was probably her closest and maybe only friend.  I never knew why she was here, maybe to be company for grandma.  I don't think she had any brothers or sisters.  Who knows?

I saw her once when my youngest was about two months old.  She came to town probably for her grandma's funeral.  It was awkward since I had a living child and I knew she had lost her only baby.  I never met Lee.  I never went to California.  Probably never will.  Can not think why I would want to go there.  When I think of Carol, she is 18 years old.  I remember her voice as very soft.  She never stood out, she just was.  She was Carol Mason, my friend.

Some memories live forever.  This is one of them.

I have no waist.

This is nothing new.  When I weighed 98 pounds, I had a 29 inch waist.  Since then I have gained 40 pounds and my waist is 36 inches.  An hour glass figure was always something I longed for, but never achieved back in my younger days.  Mother was always the practical one.  She dismissed it as "So?" That did not seem to help much.

As I inch my way toward being an "octogenarian", I think I have finally come to grips with the fact that it really doesn't matter anymore.  Back in high school it seemed to matter.  Barbara was 36-24-36.  The rest of the girls were similar, but found it amusing that I was 32-29-34.  While they weighed in at higher numbers, I tipped the scales at 89 pounds. The boys found them fascinating; they found me strange.  The "in girls" tittered when the boys entered our realm.  While the girls seemed to accept me as I was, the boys were looking for boobs.

Irene had huge ones so she was a real hit.  Martha found boys stupid and she would rather play the piano.  I found boys strange creatures.  Then there was that the phenomenon of the changing voice that boys had to contend with that proved embarrassing to them!  One would be talking in a normal voice and then out would come a word in his little boy voice.  We would always laugh, but I am sure it was hard on them as the "tiny boobs" thing was to me.  Kids are cruel.

I started my high school years living with my grandmother and great grandmother, so by the time I got back to Nickerson, I entered high school as a Sophomore.  My class mates from grade school had new friends and I was the outsider.   We had a larger curriculum, and the teachers expected us to actually do our home work AND turn it in at the end of class or beginning if it was something we did at night.  I had a Speech class and it was always torture for me to stand in front of a room full of people and "defend my viewpoint" on one subject or another.  Algebra was like a foreign concept.  History was boring.  Chemistry was an accident waiting to happen in a beaker on my table.  So I started skipping class in my Junior year and by my Senior year I was a secret drinker.  I never graduated.  I did, later in life get my GED and went to Business College where I graduated Magna cum laude which helped not one iota in the restaurant business since I was a cook or waitress and not the owner.

I have 5 kids and my body has changed, but the hour glass figure that I so longed for is still not a reality.  I have developed a personality of sorts so, that is good.  At least I have friends.

So I guess the moral of this blog is "God don't make junk!"  It is not what is on the outside that matters.  He will judge me by the content of my heart and the deeds I have done.

I sure hope that is how it happens, cause life sure does get tediuos!

Plevna, Kansas, Grandma Haas and Great Grandma Hatfield

I know I have written about my Plevna years, but in case you missed it let me go there again.  Grandma Haas, who was Mother's mother, had a stroke mys last year of grade school.  Great Grandma Hatfield was pushing 100 and could not take care of her alone, so I was sent to stay with them and do what I could.  This meant I started my Freshman year in the little Plevna High School.  The whole high school was less then 40 kids.  Plevna was a farming community and all the kids in school were farmer's kids.  I stuck out like a sore thumb.  But it was what it was and there I stayed.  I do not remember any of those kids I went to school with.  There was a family named Smith that lived catty cornered from the grandma's and I went over there sometimes, but was under strict orders not to look at their television because that was the work of the devil!


The family consisted of Mr. and Mrs. Smith and a whole bunch of girls.  I can recall 5 for sure.  I never saw a boy, so that may have been the family.  There may have been a son some where but I do not recall.  Mr. Smith had one blue eye and one brown eye.  That was something I had never seen before and have not seen since.  I see it occasionally in dogs, but never in a human.  Of course, I do not actually seek the phenomenon out, so it may slip by me undetected.

There were several things that amazed and intrigued me about the Smith family.  The first was the size of the house.  It was a two story that had never seen a coat of paint.  It must have been about 10 rooms and was lathe and plaster.  I know this because the ceiling of the foyer fell down and we were then relegated to using the back door because no one cleaned up the mess.  Later the ceiling in the front room would fall also.  That was more serious as Mr. Smith was napping on the couch under it when it collapsed and received a small cut.  We did praise God that it was not more serious!  One room contained a quilt frame which always held a quilt, but I do not know if anyone ever quilted or it was just there.

As in most homes of that era, the plumbing consisted of a privvy out back and a pump by the back door and usually one in the kitchen.  This was the other thing that amazed me about the family dynamic.  There were several wash tubs located in the kitchen.  They were there to hold the dirty dishes.  On Saturday, they heated water and washed all the dishes.  It was a bee hive of activity on that day as all the women folk were there and working feverishly to get the chore done.  When the dishes were all washed, dried, and put away it was time to heat the water and wash the clothes.  Saturdays were definitely work days at the Smith house!  Mr. Smith stayed in his chair by the window looking out at the back yard.  The dog stayed by him so it did not get stepped on by the scurrying women.  I did not go over there on Saturday.

Sunday I was expected to attend church.   Mom and dad would come for a visit about once a month.  They brought the 3 younger girls.  This was always special to me.  Dinner would be on the table when I got home.  It was always a feast and always the same fare.  Great grandma fried chicken and the rest of the meal materialized around that.   You know the comfort food thing?  Mashed potatoes, gravy, corn, green beans, homemade dinner rolls, butter, jelly and pudding of some sort or another for dessert.  Some times a cake or pie.  Celery stuffed with peanut butter.  Pickled beets and sweet pickles.  The poor table would be groaning from all the food.  Never went hungry at Sunday dinner.
As I recall we never ate after the sun went down.  Dishes were washed and back in the cupboard in very short order.  The men folk, which usually consisted of my father, sat in the rocking chair with his thumbs hooked together over his stomach.  Grandma died in January of my freshman year.  Aunt Mabel came from Coldwater and took great grandma back with her.  I returned to Nickerson and the bosom of my family.

My father.  As I recall, my father was a big man.  His skin was very white and his hair had at one time been mostly red, but not a bright red.  It was more like a reddish blonde with a tad of brown.  He had freckles on his hands which were very white and not calloused at all.  I don't remember his eyes.  He had a big stomach and always wore overalls.  He wore brown, high top shoes.  Funny the things we remember from our childhood.  I think he may have been English with a bit of Irish, but who knows.
I do not think he liked me very much.  I know Mary was his favorite, but Mary was everyone's favorite.  Mother kept all of us girl's hair very short, but Mary was allowed to let hers grow long.  We were all so jealous!  Dorothy was the baby.  Donna and I were just there as  middle children.  Josephine ran away and got married very young.  Jake forged his birth certificate to show his age as 17 when he was 15 and joined the Army.  That made me the oldest of the youngest kids at home.  I relished in that and was very bossy.

At night we played "kick the can"  with the neighbor kids.  That is a game of hide and go seek which entailed placing a can on the ground and the one who was "it" counted while everyone hid.  Then the "it" person had to find each one and bring them back to "base".  While the "it" person went to search for the remaining hidden, some one could sneak in and "kick the can" which freed the ones who were stuck in the "jail".  Game sometimes went on for hours.  In day time we had "clod " fights.  This required a freshly plowed field.  We usually chose small clods which had dried and threw them at each other.  They usually crumbled on contact, but if they had been baking in the sun several days, they tended to be a little harder and left marks.  As tempers flared, the clods got bigger and more then one tear was shed either from pain, frustration, or from an eye full of dirt!  Brother Jake decided at one time to pull out his .22 rifle.  Little shit!  The game was over for the day and he was the winner for sure.

More about Plevna later, but now I have to go tend to the geese.

Finishing up my grade school years.

I remember little about my grade school years and whether that is by choice or chance, I know not.  Every year we had a class picture made and every year I was on the end of the front row because we were grouped according to height and I was pretty much the runt of the litter, so to speak.  I remember we had to walk to a seperate building for music class.  Miss Barkiss was the teacher and she later married David Houston, who was the son of the Principal at Nickerson Grade School. I do know I could not hit a note if my life depended on it.  I still remember her making me stand in front of the class and how hard I tried to hit middle "c" what ever the hell that was.  I don't think I have hit it yet, though I do love to caterwaul the country music I grew up listening to on the radio.  When it was time for the annual music program, Miss Barkiss gave me the job of announcer since I could not sing, but my voice carried and she needed some one whose voice carried.  I loved that.  I could stay behind the curtain with my microphone and no one could see me.
Most of the school work I considered stupid and did not bother doing it.  Poor mother!  I remember  a few of the kids I went to school with, but really don't care what became of them, although I do wish them well.  Nancy Cuthberson who's dad was in constuction and they had 2 Great Pyrennes dogs that I was terrified would step over the fence and eat me.  Martha Knobloch was a pianist and we were taken to her recital which was held at her home and we had to dress up and we were most uncomfortable, but for years after I would point at her house and tell whoever I was with that I had been inside that home and it was beautiful!  Barbara Hawk was the daughter of the dentist and my best friend.  Mother cleaned house for Mrs. Hawk and sewed for them.  I remember once I was over there and Mr Hawk made us an ice cream with a cherry on top and mine fell off and I cried like a baby, so he gave me another one.  There was Joan Moore, Beth McGonigle, Linda Schlatter, Gary Battey, Earl Kelly, David Sjoborg who's older brother was at college and died in a car wreck.  Irene Rienke, Evelyn Piper, Loren McQueen, Kenny Fenton, Ronnie Beck, and names that completely elude me.
In 8th grade 2 new boys arrived on the scene.  Billy Newman and Steve Dorrell were from the big city of Hutchinson.  The were cousins.  I had no idea what cool was, but one look at Steve and I knew the definition of cool, super cool, and coolest thing in the world.
Remember Fonzie?   The Fonz?  Steve exuded cool and never let on that he even knew us little girls were batting our heads against a stone wall.  He wore blue jeans with the belt loops cut off so they rode down his hips just a tiny bit.  He wore a white dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up exactly one and a half turns.  And the collar up in the back, but laying flat in the front.  His black hair was combed into a duck tail and every hair was held in place with axle grease.  Billy was just there, but when Steve walked in the room he arrived and when he left, he sucked the air out of the room.  He was skinny, giving him the lean and hungry look  He was my first honest to goodness crush, and bless his heart, he had eyes only for himself.
I do not remember graduating from grade school.  I don't think it was a big deal back then.  I just remember reading on my report card that Louella Bartholomew was promoted to grade 9.  That was it. Grade school was behind me.  Off to the big High School on the other end of Main Street.  But, alas, before that could happen my life took a bit of a turn and I was sent to Plevna, Kansas to take care of grandma Haas and Great Grandma Hatfield, thus seperating me from classmates I had gone to school with for 8 years.
Stay tuned.

Memories of Great Grandma Hatfield.

The summer before I started my high school days, I was sent from my home in Nickerson, Kansas to Plevna, Kansas, to live with my great grandmother and my grandmother, both on my mother's side.  My dear grandmother had suffered a stroke at some point and since great grandmother was over 100 years old, the family thought she should have some help and I was a likely looking candidate since the only girl cousins I had were of marrying age and I was barely into puberty.  So off I went.
The grandmothers had a two story frame house.  Two bedrooms upstairs, one down, a large living room, a dining room, kitchen and located in the hallway under the stairwell, a commode.  That is to say a bathroom stool and that was it.  No sink, no nothing and I was not allowed to use it.  I might either break it or wear it out.  It was for grandma Haas only.  Great grandma and I could just trot on out back and use the "outhouse".  And so we did.  Rain, sleet, heat, or snow could not stay us from our several times daily rounds.  Had a "chamber pot" for night time needs cause God only knew what was out at night.
I was not allowed to sleep upstairs in one of the beds because Lord only knows what was up there.  So I slept on the couch right outside of thier bedroom.  My clothes were kept in a box inside the stair way on the second step.  I took a "bath" once a week by setting an enamel bowl on grandmothers stool and using a wash cloth.  I missed the big zinc tub we had at home.
Great grandmother was a very regal lady.  She was small boned, but tall.  She always held herself in a very formal and staid position.  At least I thought she had regal bearing, but as I think back, the woman was over 100 years old!  She probably couldn't have bent if she had to.  I am not near that old and I am beginning to get a little formal bearing about my own self!  She was very hard of hearing (again the age thing no doubt).  The high school was only one block from home, so I ran home for lunch every day.  When I would come out the door and start home I could hear great grandmother's old stand up radio broadcasting the market prices for wheat and corn.  The only time the radio was turned on was at straight up noon and that was to hear the market report.  She did not always have it tuned in exactly and the news would bleed in also, but she was happy as she sat in her rocker and nodded her head to the man giving the report.  No doubt she was lost in another time and place.  Farming runs in our blood.
Every evening we set up the kitchen for breakfast.  3 plates on the table each with 1/2 an orange and silverware. A dripolater was filled with water, coffee grounds were put in the basket, and it was set on a pilot light.  The egg poacher was filled with water and set on the other pilot light.  3 eggs were placed in a bowl on the table near the stove along with the bread.  Jelly was in the center of the table and the table was covered with a cloth.  Next morning the coffee was pulled to the burner and the fire started under it.  Same with the poacher.  Eggs were broken and placed in the poacher tins.  Bread was placed in the toaster and it was plugged in.  The toaster toasted the bread on one side and that side was opened and the toast slid into place so when I closed it the untoasted side would be next to the bare wires and it could be toasted.  In the meantime the dripolater magically sucked the boiling water up into the top of the pot.  I then turned it off and it magically let it come back down through the grounds again.  Time elapsed making breakfast...5 minutes.
I was allowed to put the dishes in a dishpan and set them under the sink to wait for evening.  Great grandmother had a sandwich for me at noon and I could add those dishes to the pan.  When I came home from school I immediately put the kettle on to heat the water to do the dishes.  Those being done and put away in the cupboard, I then went outside to water the plants.  Sometimes I stole a leaf of mint off the big mint plant and chewed it.
You should know that the 85 year difference in great grandmother and myself was most evident in my schooling.  She was very strict and very set in her ways.  I was not allowed to read books for enjoyment.  If I had time to read, I must read the Bible.  Every evening I read to them for at least an hour.  What we read was never discussed.  It was the holy gospel and that was that.  Never question and interpret the way she said.  Needless to say, I got a goose egg for a book report.  Mother explained that one to the principal  and while he understood, a book report was required.  So I gave him a synopsis of the Holy Bible.  Kept me from flunking.
For fun she taught me to crochet.  She gave me a hook and a ball of thread and I started the world's longest chain.  Every night after supper, we would set in our chairs and "take up" our needle work.  I will say this...I made some beautiful doilies under her watchful eye.  If it wasn't correct, it was ripped out and the mistake corrected and done over.  Guess that was where I got this perfectionist attitude I deal with today.  Damn!
My introduction and education into matters of sex education took place one afternoon when great grandmother was at the outhouse.  Grandma said, "Have you started your woman thing yet?"  Since I had no idea what she was talking about I said, "No" and she replied, "When I did, mama let me stay in bed all day."  I decided I sure wanted that to happen to me! 
When they needed groceries great grandmother would ring up Mr. or Mrs. Hinshaw at the store and she would tell them what she needed.  They would deliver it to the house.  Some times if it was just a loaf of bread or something small, she would tie the money in the corner of a handkerchief and I was sent to the store which was a block away, being trusted to remember what I wanted. I really felt like a big girl then!
Grandma used a walker and the only time she got to get out of the house was to go to the doctor.  But she was so sweet.  Her smile would melt the heart of the devil himself.  I am so glad I got to spend the little time with her that I did.

Next time I pop in here I am going to tell you how this chapter of my life played out.  So stay tuned.

 

 

 

************************************************************************ This is the novel I have for sale on Amazon. Do not be confused by the title. Chapter One simply means this is my first book. There may never be another, or there may be many more. I am very proud of this endeavor and guarantee you will enjoy the book in it's enirety. Lou Mercer

From the back cover

Chapter One...Loose Ends
Lou Mercer

Meg Parker led a simple life.  She was a widow of three years and lived on a chicken farm at the foot of the mighty Rockie Mountains.  Life was good and her little store on eBay made her extra spending money.  But snow and wildlife were not the only things lurking in the forest above her house.  Nor did it stay in the forest for long.

Marshall Purcell came home a wounded veteran from vietnam.  He still had his dreams, but they were of an incestuous past that threatened to consume him.

When Meg and Marshall met it seemed an inconsequential meeting, but it changed both their lives forever.  And change is not always a good thing.

This is adult fiction at its best without all the sex.  Well, maybe just a little bit. 

About the author.  Lou Mercer was born in Nickerson, Kansas. She came to Pueblo, Colorado in 1977 and is now a product of the majestic Rockie Mountains

Now it is back to High School at Nickerson, Kansas.

Well, I did digress there a little, but I am sure had I stayed on the ancestry I would never move on with this little tale.  Sooner or later you are going to know a very lot about me.  May not all be good either!

Ok, so now I am back in Nickerson and I must go to school, like it or not.  In Nickerson one class was as large as the whole high school at Plevna.  I came from a city where everyone knew everyone and now I was adrift in a sea of faces, very few of whom I had any idea who they were.  I very promptly fell in with the "wrong crowd".  Never knew there was such a thing, but there I was smack dab in the middle of one.

Now, you are probably going to wonder about this paragraph, but I swear it is all true.  At about this time Nickerson began building a new High School.  I think I went to the old building and the new building at the same time.  I think, but I am not sure.  I remember very little about the 2 1/2 years I spent at that school.  I remember that I flunked sewing (Home Economics), scraped by Algebra, English, History, Latin and Speech was a complete disaster.  I do remember that one of my new friend's dad made home brew!  As I recall, that was a tasty concoction.  I do recall sleeping through a lot of my classes.

I recall dating once or twice, but never dated anyone the second time.  I recall that Hutchinson Naval Air Station was still in operation during my Junior year and the neighbor girl married a guy from there and moved back to Indiana or some such place.    Her sister dated one of the "swabbies".  Not me man!  Those guys were way to smooth for this little hick, although I did meet one who was here from France and I let him kiss me! Mama mia!  That's a spicy meatball!  Also about that time something was going on overseas and several Polish guy wound up in our circle.  That is all I recall about that business.

Sorry to disappoint all ye who had faith in me, but this is the way it was.  I know there are those of you who recall every moment of your existence, but I am not sure of dates and events enough to elaborate.  I am pretty sure I was there and I am pretty sure I behaved fairly normally.  I do recall the "sock hops" at Memorial Hall (?) in Hutch and I recall a guy named Joey and winning several dance contests.  That Joey was into what ever we danced to back then.  I guess it was just plain old Rock and Roll. He and I were a perfect match and we had lots of fun together.  I do not recall ever kissing Joey and years later I learned why.  Seems he was the first gay boy I ever knew.  (You do realize names have been changed to protect the innocent?) Joey actually died from AIDS many, many years later, although this is all through the grapevine.  I never seen or talked to him again after our sock hop days, oh and the fiasco when he took me to Joyland in Wichita and I threw up on the Round Up.  We made a recording in a booth there and I kept that for many years.  Wonder where that went?

During my life at Nickerson High School there were several memorable events.  Elvis Presley hit the scene on the Ed Sullivan Show.  Oh, that was love at first sight for a lot of girlies!  My brother joined the Army, went to Germany and came home from Germany.  Momma finished secretary school and we moved to Hutchinson. 

I think my head is going to explode!  I better go let the ducks and geese out and do something mundane for a while!  Hopefully see you tomorrow!