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Sunday, April 12, 2020

I glimpsed my future and that shit ain't gonna happen here!

Remember a while back when I was flirting with the idea of dating because I thought it might be nice to have a gentleman friend to hang out with?  Plead the blood of Jesus over that thought!  I saw myself at the grocery store yesterday and Lou Mercer is not ready for that!  We are in week number something or other ( I have actually lost track of time) of this social distancing and not getting closer than 6 feet to any other human.  I am a rather gregarious soul and do enjoy people so this has been very trying for me and probably a lot of other people.  But, back to the subject.

I went to Lagrees yesterday to pick up a couple items that I needed.  I always start on the produce aisle.  I picked up a bag of lettuce, a tomato, and 3 bananas.  Next stop was the mark down shelf.  There was already a gentleman there, so I waited.  He picked up each bag and ran his fingers over the plastic covering of each item in every bag.  He deemed three of them as good enough to go home with him and I watched as he took them over and put them in a grocery cart that was attended by a lovely lady that I figured must be his wife.  I saw he already had several of the bags in the cart.  A cursory look at the rack told me he had taken anything that was worth paying for.

I caught sight of him several more times in my journey through the store.  The lady never let go of the cart and when he would venture off to check something out, she remained with the cart.  Very soon I formed a vision in my mind of what life with this guy would be like.  I would be in charge of the cart and he, as the bread winner, would be in charge of what went in the cart, and also what I would eat.  I pictured the home with him collecting the mail and sorting through it and letting me look at the advertisements that arrived.  He would pay the bills while I stood quietly by.  I wondered if the woman had any wants or desires of her own.  I know I have plenty!

The jest here is that he was the man of the house.  He decided what they would eat.  My job would be lord only knows what.  I made up my mind from that 15  minute peek into some one else's life that no way in hell do I need a man.  Been there, done that, and like it like it is. I want to push my own cart and put in it what I want to eat.  I really do not mind picking up a bag on the discount shelf and finding day old produce in it.  I usually always buy my bananas when they are ready to turn because they make better banana bread.  When I buy eating bananas they are usually pretty green.

I did not see them leave the store, but I am betting money, he was driving.  Now, I am pretty sure that  they have a tidy house, they eat good and no doubt watch the same shows every week night that they watched for the last 40 years.  Maybe I am just getting old and set in my ways, but I would like to steer the boat, so to speak, every once in a while.

Granted it would be nice to have a man around to talk to and share my day with, but I have baggage and I am pretty sure any man I find in this day and age is going to have his own baggage and I just am not ready for that.  I sometimes eat breakfast for supper and sometimes my noon day meal is something I just ran through the blender.  Or more often than not, a nap instead of eating.

I am a packrat, by nature.  I buy my own car when I need one.  I love my company and I am pretty sure it is going to stay that way.  The square dancing lessons are over.  Fishing out the back of the boat is over.  Classic Country music still plays on my stereo and always will.  Last man friend I had gave me a jazz cd.  Wonder where that went?

So, stay home.  Stay safe.  And stay single!  That will be my mantra!

2 comments:

kokuaguy said...

As you know, after seven decades on the planet when I couldn't imagine living my life without a woman companion in it, I let a man move in and now we've been together for almost 19 months. It's been the happiest time of my life and I can't imagine going on without him. He's not one of those controlling dudes that you observed at Legrees. We were both raised by strong, hard working, highly intelligent women who showed us how to partner with a man, forming a team that succeeds because the partnership is greater than the sum of its parts. The skill sets of each partner are respected and valued and relied upon by the other. Jimmy was always content to have me do the grocery shopping until this horrible plague changed all our lives. Now he won't hardly let me leave the house and I'm grateful that I don't have to. Both of us are taking the quarantine very seriously, because at my age especially it's not likely to end well. We've been separated a few times when I've visited my Aunt Audrey in Anaheim and it was not easy, but now he has a job in Denver caretaking the properties of a wealthy family who spend part of the year in Mexico, so I will be having more time to myself in Pueblo. But the time that we do have together will be all the more enjoyable I think. The last six days have certainty been wonderful. The home we're sharing is like a castle. We'll be headed south later today. I will call you next week. Please take care of yourself as best you can. I promise to do the same. And, whatever you do, never stop writing. 😁

kokuaguy said...

As you know, after seven decades on the planet when I couldn't imagine living my life without a woman companion in it, I let a man move in and now we've been together for almost 19 months. It's been the happiest time of my life and I can't imagine going on without him. He's not one of those controlling dudes that you observed at Legrees. We were both raised by strong, hard working, highly intelligent women who showed us how to partner with a man, forming a team that succeeds because the partnership is greater than the sum of its parts. The skill sets of each partner are respected and valued and relied upon by the other. Jimmy was always content to have me do the grocery shopping until this horrible plague changed all our lives. Now he won't hardly let me leave the house and I'm grateful that I don't have to. Both of us are taking the quarantine very seriously, because at my age especially it's not likely to end well. We've been separated a few times when I've visited my Aunt Audrey in Anaheim and it was not easy, but now he has a job in Denver caretaking the properties of a wealthy family who spend part of the year in Mexico, so I will be having more time to myself in Pueblo. But the time that we do have together will be all the more enjoyable I think. The last six days have certainty been wonderful. The home we're sharing is like a castle. We'll be headed south later today. I will call you next week. Please take care of yourself as best you can. I promise to do the same. And, whatever you do, never stop writing. 😁

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