Gay Pride Month

 Having been raised in Kansas I have ideas about politics that I should probably keep to myself, but you know me!  I will first go on record as saying, I was raised by a Republican registered voter mother and as such, I respected her opinion.  As I grew and matured, I realized that I was probably going to choose a different party.  And I did indeed choose differently when I became active in Colorado.

I became involved in the gay rights movement, which did not gel well with my mommy, but that was the route I choose and if I had it to do it all over again I would still have chosen that road.  Now my mother had a very good friend and co-worker who just happened to be gay.  Gibby was also a friend of mine.  We worked together and he helped me with the kids Christmas one year.  Good friends are hard to find and even harder to keep.

Sadly this all transpired at the time that a disease that was called HIV was rearing it's ugly head out in California.  It was the "gay disease" because it seemed to only affect gay people.  It was the "hot potato" of the political world at that time.  No one wanted to address it.  It was as if the politicains completely ignored it, "it" would go away.  Sadly it did not.

Randy Shultz wrote a book and named it for what it was "And the Band Played on".  It entailed the inaction that occured during that period.  The government continued to ignore the "gay disease".  It was indeed a phenomena in that only gay people got it and only gay people died from it.  Since it only affected that one segment of society it was not important.  But then it began to bleed over into the WASP community and that was a wake up call.

I do not have time nor inclination to go into all the  ramifications of the governments inaction at that period in time.  This is about my friend Gibby and how his life meant something to my mother and to me.  Gibby was not infected at the time I left Hutchinson.  Dates mean nothing to me in my memories of him.  I only know that I was living in Colorado when I got the call that Gib had moved to California and  he had tested postitive for the virus.  He wanted to come "home" for Christmas.  Mother was concerned about "catching it".  So to make a long story short, Gibby died in California and is buried some where that was not disclosed because of the "shame that surrounded his death."  His family was afraid that someone might "dig him up" and "desecrate his body."  And the Band Played on.

But as with most of life, time moved on.  The disease was named  Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome and later and finally settled on as HIV (human immunodeficiency virus).  It is no longer the dark secret that it was in the beginning.  Since the death of my sweet Gibby, I have been very active in the movement.  Some one in California started a memorial quilt with panels for each death designed and executed by someone who loved that person.   This is a link to that project.

I have designed and executed a miniature to be held here locally and shown the month of December at out local library.  We usually have a ceremony of commemeration on December 1, which is designated World AIDS Day.   Covid put a stop to that!   I have once more digressed so let me get back on track.

This is gay pride month.  So my hat is off to Gibby and all the pioneers before him who stood up and said "Yes I am gay!  And I am proud!  It is who I am!"

I am proud to say that I helped bring gay pride to Pueblo.  It is what it is and I have plagues in my china cabinet that proves I am more than just a clanging cymbal.

Smile down, Gibby, because I will never forget you and your unconditional love to me and my family!  And thank you to the doctors, nurses, health care providers and all the people who jumped into the fray to restore sanity to a period that had none at the time.

Peace!

Rest in Peace Larry Kramer

I started a big long blog that entailed the history of how and why I became involved in the Gay Rights movement back in the early 80's , but that is irrelevant.  What is relevant is the death of Larry Kramer.  If you do not know who he is, you need to Google him.  He was a writer, a playwright, a military man.  He tried to commit suicide at one point.  But most importantly, he was the man who sounded the alarm for the disease that was killing gay men.  It was a phenomenal event back then.  No one knew why gay men were dying, but they were and in greater numbers. 

In 1981 he published an article calling attention to this in a gay periodical.  Two years later he published again, this time calling it "1,112 and Counting".  It was about this time that I may have shaken myself out of the lethargic cocoon within which I was wrapped.  I had a good friend back home named Gilbert who fell victim to the disease about that time.  He was the first friend I lost, but he would not be the last.

I began to follow the news and Larry Kramer.  It was staggering statistics for sure.  And it just kept going.  Does any one remember when Colorado passed Amendment 2?  We worked very hard to get that overturned.  We were fighting for Gay Rights and we were fighting the AIDS epidemic.  I think Larry Kramer and I were fighting the same battles, but on different ends of the country, but for the same reasons.

I wish I could have met him.  Some of my best friends are in the gay community and I have always championed their cause.  I see I am rambling, so let me just sum this up and get back to life.

Larry Kramer was a giant among men and his legacy will live forever.  Our world is a better place for him having passed through it.  In 2002, he said: "I put the truth in writing.  That's what I do: I have told the fucking truth to everyone I have ever met."

And that, my friends is why Larry Kramer holds a special place in my heart.

Lawrence David Kramer, writer and activist, born 25 June, 1935: died 27 May 2020

A day late, but relative nonetheless.

I was about 20 years late getting into the fight for Gay Rights, but when I got on board I gave it my all.  Stonewall was nothing to me in 1969.  I did not know any gay people because there were not any in my world of western Kansas at that time.  Little did I know that my 4 year old son would open my eyes and make me see the injustice of discrimination.  Little did I know that less than 20 years later I would be not only waving the flag, but it would be one I stitched with care.  I knew nothing about PFLAG in 1969, but by 1973 I was a whole lot wiser.  By then I was single and working at the Red Rooster Restaurant with a little guy named Gibby.  Gib was a very good friend of my mother, so of course he was a friend of mine.  Gib was gay.

I had never to my knowledge ever even seen a gay person, but now I was friends with one.  And it was nice to have a male friend that I could go dancing with, or hang out with and not have to worry about a romantic involvement.  Then I started my journey  that has led me to where I am today.  I moved to Colorado in 1977 leaving Gib and my mother and siblings behind.  Soon after the "gay disease" reared it's ugly head.  In June of 1981 the CDC  published a paper about a strange disease that was affecting gay men.  And thus began the AIDS epidemic.  I am not here to give you a history lesson, only to tell you why I am where and who I am today.

Gibby was one of the first to die.  He is buried in an unmarked grave somewhere in central Kansas.  He is only one of many that received the same treatment.  Fear held us in it's paralyzing grip.  There was talk at one point of isolating the "victims".  The CDC scrambled to set up guidelines and finally succeeded in calming the fears, approving new meds and I am happy to say that now it is not even

mentioned as AIDS, but is HIV and it is a manageable condition.  I speak of HIV only because it led me to the gay rights movement.  

In 1983 I married Kenneth and for the next 8 years I lived a fairly mundane existence.  This all ended when the religious right groups headquartered in Colorado Springs put forth Amendment #2 for the Colorado Constitution that basically stated that gays and homosexuals were to be denied civil rights protection.  This was on the ballot for the November 3, 1992 election. It was known as the "Hate State Amendment 2". 

It was worded in such a way that it was confusing to say the least and it passed.  Barely, but it did pass and the gay community was devastated.  At that time there was a catering business on Elizabeth and for some reason we congregated there.  We were all so disappointed because what this bill did was basically declare open season on gays.  The place was filled to overflowing and that night "Pueblo After 2"  was born.  We knew that as gay and straight we had to band together.  As a straight person I could advocate for my gay friends.  Warren, David, Joe, Carolyn, and the list goes on.  Along with  Nancy and Jalia, PFLAG was born in Pueblo.  Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays.  It was the local chapter of a national group.  

Events and times become confused in my little mind and I think I should have kept a journal.  But I did not.  I did what needed done with the help of my colleagues. Westboro never stood a chance with us.  Pueblo After 2 morphed in Southern Colorado Equality Alliance.  Southern Colorado AIDS Project was borne of the need to take care of our afflicted children.  

At some point in time I conceived the Pueblo AIDS Memorial Quilt which is hung at the Rawlings Library the end of  November through most of December.  World AIDS day is observed on the 4th floor every December 1 and I am guest of honor.  

We have come a long way, but there is still work to do.  I was given a lot of awards over the years, but none as prestigious as the mother who thanked me recently for giving her son the strength to acknowledge who he is! That is called "coming out" in case you wondered.

Kinda' makes it all worth it.

My life after Trump

Anyone who knows me even slightly, knows I am a liberal.  I did not say Democrat, but I did say liberal.  And that should be in capital letters.  I was once called a flaming liberal by a man I cared about at the time.  Well, actually it was the "f" word, but not flaming.  My response was to walk away.  My mother always said to "call a spade, a spade."  She also said a "A lie by any other name is still a lie."  And "Be true to yourself because at the end of the day there is no one there, but you and your God."  So I have tried to mostly follow what my momma said, and that night was no different.  I must confess I felt a small tinge of sadness as I turned my back and walked away.  I knew I would miss the little guy, but it had to be done for me to live with myself.

Democrats and Republicans can live together, but not Conservatives and Liberals.  So I went off to my AIDS Walk and my Los Pobres and my Gay and Lesbian friends.  I went to my UCC church that my sister in law had called "a den of iniquity".  I frequented the soup kitchen and took water to the homeless.  And Sherman went his way.

For 5 months he did what ever it is big, tall, bigoted men do.  I heard not a word from nor about him.  I did kind of miss him sometimes, but life is never what we want as much as what we get.  I actually started dating a guy who, while he may not have approved of my Liberal stance, he accepted it.  That was about all I could hope for so I went with that. Damn!  I just realized that I can not remember his name!

Now those of you who know me, also know that I am a very simple minded woman and almost completely unable to lie.  I have been called many things in my life, but never a liar.  If I think something, I say it.  If I feel something, I do it.  This guy was not like that.  He fawned over me like I was some sort of goddess, but it was not in his eyes.  I did not see the acceptance and giving that needed to be there.  Oh, he was free enough with the old checkbook, but the smile on his lips never reached his eyes, and that is very important to me.  So when my phone rang that cold night right after Christmas and it was Sherman on the other end,  I could see hope for life again.  Intelligent conversation.  Eating at the greasy spoon on Northern.  And this time it was different.

He no longer watched Fox news 24/7.
He met with Sister Nancy at his home.
He carried my food up the stairs at the SCAP office when I held my lunches.

Those of you who know me know the story of Sherman and how he remained a Republican, but became a liberal.  You know how he died and you know he proposed on his deathbed and changed his will to leave me everything he had in life.  His clothes went to Los Pobres along with all the groceries he had rat holed.  When his will was probated he gave me $45,000 for me to use "as I saw fit for my causes."  And I did.

If you go back in this blog you can find a story called "Long Ago and Not Very Far Away."  He knew I liked to write and he wanted me to write our story.  So I did.  Or just email me and I will send it to you in pdf. fomat.  loumercer3@aol.com

So, back to my life after Trump.  I tell you about Sherman because he would have been a Trump supporter before he met me.  Now do not think for one moment that I am special.  I am not.  The only inference that sentence has is to make clear that I was the instrument that lead Sherman to explore the avenue that there were other beliefs out there and that the gays were actually human beings with human feelings.  He learned that there was a wider world where "wet backs" labored in the fields to feed him and that homeless people slept under bridges because they had no where else to go.  He learned that "soup kitchens"  feed hungry people and missions feed hungry souls.  He learned that a little kindness goes a long way and just because you think one way, does not mean everyone else does.

I hope we can "come together"  after Trump, but right now my soul is tattered by a man that hates gays, women, Obama, immigrants, and apparently everyone that is not him.  I did not make this up.  He said it.  He was very clear about the blacks.  I know the day is coming when he is going to have to tell his supporters that there is not going to be a wall built between us and Mexico and I fear civil unrest when that day comes.  What can we do?

It beats hell out of me!

Good Morning World!

Just want to open my eyes and say that!  It is before 6:00 AM and I do not have the news on yet, although AOL news let me know that the world's oldest manatee turns 100.  How they know that beats hell out of me, but be sure it is way better news then I am going to get when I turn the silly television on and watch Hillary and Donald, both frothing at the mouth because the other one is a total asshole.  "Vote for me, because I am the lesser of the two evils!"  I ask you, is this how to run an election?

Oh, and over on the side lines we have the Bernie supporters who are not going to give up on Bernie because he will change the world.  I am sick of hearing it all and we are still 3 full months away from going into the voting booth, if we actually get to do that any more.  I forget the last time I drove over to Pleasantview and walked out with my little  "I voted" sticker.

Democratic, Republican, Libertarian, Independent and whoever else is running for the highest office in this land, you all need to know something up front.  I am not voting for the candidate that is put forth by whatever party simply because that is my party.  I am not voting for the one who has the latest dirt on the other candidate.  I am not voting   for the candidate who screams the loudest, uses the dirtiest words, or points a finger upward and declares, " I am running because I beleive in God and I will bring our country back to God!"  God did not nominate any of you.

I do not want to know what Hillary did in her emails, because all of them do the same thing.  I do not want to know that Trump's wife plagurized Michelle Obama or that he screwed people out of money.  What I want to know is did any of you read the constitution?  Did any of you study our history from the time we set foot on this shore and seen this country through the eyes of the immigrants in Ellis Island?  Do you know what Ellis Island is and what it represented to those people?  Do you understand that WE were the immigrants?  Do you know how many Indians we massacred to get to where we are today?

Did you study what the slaves, brought here in the bellies of ships owned by slave traders endured?  Did you study how they were auctioned off like so many cattle in public squares and sold to men owning big plantations that needed free labor?  Did you know that when babies were born they became the property of the "Massa"?  Did you study how many souls were lost in the Civil War on both sides of the battle? Did you know it was illegal for a slave to know how to read or write?

Do you remember John F. Kennedy?  Did you study the Civil Rights movement at all?

Do you know what the Stonewall Rebellion is about?

Does World Trade mean anything to you?

What is fracking?

What are GMO's.

Why do we pay property taxes?

Why is Black Hills Energy allowed to gouge people that are unable to pay?

What are we going to do about the homeless people that are seen daily on our streets?

Why is the pharmacuetical industry not checked on thier prices?

Why is medical care so high?

What about the pet population?

What about the illegal drugs that are killing our kids?

I could go on all day, but the bottom line is this...I do not give a rat's ass if Hillary spent her money on a dress from wherever and I am going to look at what her record actually is, not what the spin doctors tell me.  The state of Donald Trump's hair and whether or not he has ever been faithful to anything or anyone is none of my business.  Until we, as a people, stand up and demand decency from the highest leaders of the land  we might as well forget that there is an election coming up and set in our little pile of shit and stay comfortable.  As long as we stay in that pile it is warm, it is when we try to get out of it that we get cold and uncomfortable and realize what a stinking mess we are in today.

Debbie told me that.

Full text of my speech in case you missed it last night.

MY NAME IS LOU MERCER.  I STAND BEFORE YOU AS THE PROUD MOTHER OF A GAY SON.  I STAND BEFORE YOU AS THE PROUD SISTER OF A LESBIAN.  I STAND BEFORE YOU AS THE PROUD AUNT OF A GAY NIECE.  MY LEGION OF FRIENDS ARE GAY.AND I STAND PROUDLY TONIGHT AS ONE WHO HAS WORKED TIRELESSLY TO HAVE MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY ACCEPTED AND PROTECTED IN THIS GREAT COUNTRY OF OURS.

I WAS THERE TO DEFEAT AMENDMENT 2.  I WAS THERE TO SEE GAY MARRIAGE BECOME A REALITY.  I WAS THERE TO SEE GAY ADOPTIONS.  I SEE GAY REPRESENTATIVES  AND SENATORS AND GOVERNORS AND MAYORS AND MINISTERS.  I HAVE MARCHED IN GAY PRIDE PARADES , BUT TONIGHT I STAND BEFORE YOU AS A HUMAN BEING MOURNING THE LOSS OF MY FELLOW HUMAN BEINGS IN A SENSELESS KILLING.

HE KNEW NONE OF HIS VICTIMS.  MORE WILL COME OUT AS THEY INVESTIGATE THIS MURDER THAT IS NOW BEING KNOWN AS THE LARGEST LOSS OF LIFE IN A KILLING ON UNITED STATES SOIL BY A SINGLE GUNMAN.   I HAVE HEARD HE PLEDGED HIS LOYALTY TO ISIS WHICH MEANS THEY CAN TIE HIM TO THE MUSLIM COMMUNITY.

NO!  NO!  WE ARE NOT GOING TO ACCEPT THIS.  CALL IT WHAT IT IS….A HOMOPHOBIC ASSHOLE THAT WANTED TO KILL GAYS.  OUR COUNTRY IS IN A DOWNWARD SPIRAL BECAUSE THE LAWS WE WORKED SO HARD TO PUT INTO PLACE ARE BEING HELD UP AND RIDICULED BY DONALD TRUMP AND HIS FOLLOWERS.  HE IS BEING HELD UP BY SO CALLED CHRISTIANS THAT POINT OUT TO US DAY AFTER DAY THAT ACCORDING THE BIBLE, HOMOSEXUALITY IS A SIN.  DO THESE PEOPLE EVEN READ THE BIBLE?  I THINK NOT.

THE NEW TESTAMENT SET ASIDE ALL THE OLD LAWS SUCH AS BURNING A CALF ON THE ALTER, MARRYING YOUR BROTHERS WIDOW , AND GOD FORBID YOU EAT SHRIMP!  HOMOSEXUALITY IS NOT EVEN DISCUSSED IN THE NEW TESTAMENT AND MOST IMPORTANTLY TO ME….JESUS CHRIST NEVER ADDRESSED THE SUBJECT.

SO LETS JUST CALL THIS WHAT IT IS, A BIGOTED PERSON WANTED TO SHOOT QUEERS AND HE DID IT! 

I AM HERE TONIGHT FOR ONLY ONE REASON AND THAT IS TO ASK US ALL TO COME TOGETHER AND REMEMBER STONEWALL.  REMEMBER WHEN THE POLICE RAIDED THE GAY CLUB AGAIN AND THE PATRONS SAID “NO MORE!”  WE HAVE COME A LONG WAYS WITH PEACEFUL RESISTANCE AND WE CAN NOT NOW BOW DOWN AND GO BACK IN THE CLOSET   WE ARE OUT!  WE ARE PROUD!  AND WE ARE NOT GOING TO BACK DOWN FROM THIS ADVERSITY. 

WE ARE IN AN ELECTION YEAR AND WE NEED TO VOTE AND WE NEED TO VOTE WISELY.  RESEARCH YOUR CANDIDATES AND PUT YOUR “X” WERE YOUR MOUTH IS.

GOD LOVES EVERYONE OF US JUST AS WE ARE.  UNFORTUNEATLY HE GAVE THE HUMAN RACE FREE WILL AND A LOT OF PEOPLE CHOOSE TO TRY TO IMPOSE THEIR FREE WILL ON US, BUT, HONEY, IT AIN’T HAPPENING ON OUR WATCH!!!

If I could shut off my memory....

Morning seems to be when I remember best.  I woke up this morning  back in the late 60's.  I was working as a waitress in a restaurant in Hutchinson.  It was my first job in the real world with my kids dependent on me since I was newly seperated and had filed for divorce.  Back in those days child support was optional and welfare required that you not work to qualify for help from the state.  So there I was.  I had never waited tables as a means of support.  Many years before I had been a cook/waitress/dishwasher at a place out on 4th street called the Tiny Tear.  Course most of my life at that time was spent in an alcohol induced fog, so I remembered little of that experience.  But now it was   ten years later.

The people who ran this resturaunt took pity on me and were very patient and they needed help on the night shift really bad.  The logistics of the job are not important, just the people.  There were the two "real waitresses" and a young girl who was attending college and supporting her self.  There was also a cook,  cook's helper and a dishwasher.  We were closed one day a week and that was the only day off that we had.  To make a long story short, the cook and the young college girl fell in love.  Oh, it was so romantic.  They billed and cooed and carried on something fierce.  She, however, appeared a lot more enthralled with the relationship than he did.  The strange part was, they never dated.  Never.

 He would leave work on Sunday when we closed and not appear again until Tuesday afternoon.  Where did he go?  The young college girl did not know.  Nor did anyone else.  She cried and he gave her a ring.  But still they never dated.  He swore he loved her with his whole heart, and she believed him.  We all did.  And like all things in life and like mother always taught me, "It all comes out in the wash!"  He was going to Wichita.  Why?  Why not?

The young college girl gave up and returned the ring.  She moved on.  He quit cooking there, the two "real waitresses" moved to Texas, and I took a job cooking at the Red Carpet Resturant.  I saw the cook from time to time, but that friendship petered out as any friendship that has secrets will.

Many years later found me in Pueblo, Colorado.  A lot of water ran under this bridge and I finally found my niche in the construction industry.  The AIDS epidemic reared it's ugly head.  It was sad back then.  People were dying at an alarming rate.  I divorced again, got my degree in accounting and all my little acolades because I was so damn smart.  Then I married for the last time.  For whatever reason I began volunteering with the AIDS group in town and it was tied in tightly with the Gay community.  I have watched the face of AIDS and sexual orientation change from complete denial to total acceptance in my life time and I am proud to say I was in the forefront of most all of it!  but I digress.

I remained friends with only a few people back home, but one of them was a friend of the cook.  Remember him?  He was the one who ran away to Wichita every chance he got.  The one who left the college girl crying.  He became quite successful in his chosen profession, but he never married.  One day his friend called me and said "Do you remember 'the cook' "?  Sure I did.  She then told me he was rushed to the hospital and they had no idea what was wrong with him, but he was in a coma.  The next day he was dead.

Weeks would pass before the autopsy returned the results of his demise.  AIDS.  Not really AIDS, but disease associated with the syndrome.  At that time it was still a "gay disease."  At that time it was selective.  It was a scourge.  You were not even tested if you were not gay, and he was not gay!  Oh, wait a minute.  All the trips to Wichita began to creep in on the corners of my mind.  Could he have been leading a secret life?  Was that what that was all about?  The young college girl had become a quite successful architect and married very well, but he had not.  He lived all alone in a very nice house and had friends, but no romantic interests.  Or  so we thought.  It all comes out in the wash.

And why do I have this on my mind this morning?  I think it is because of the hatred that is being spewed through this election.  One governor struck down a bill passed by his state governing body that legalized discrimination.  Another is proposing legislation that legalizes it!  Contenders for the position of president are calling to criminalize birth control, homosexuallity, gay marriage, and about anything that has been passed in the last 20 years.  I may have to run for office myself.

My platform would be love and tolerance.  No discrimination.  A living wage and a chicken in every pot.  The only two things I would outlaw would be homelessness and poverty.  Everyone that wanted an education would get it and a few that did not want it would get it anyway.  Drugs would be illegal.  Gangs would be illegal.  Killing people because you are a jerk and can, would be illegal.  You get the picture?  Kind of a pollyanna world, so to speak.

But in the meantime, I send good thoughts to "the cook" and everyone who hides in the shadows because of fear or shame or whatever reason.  If the college student/architect or the "two real waitresses" or someone who knows them happens to read this, I wish you would contact me.  Just go google loumercer3, or Lou Mercer.  Or leave a comment below.  I would love to hear from anyone that knew me back then.

In the meantime remember:

 BLOOM WHERE YOU ARE PLANTED!

The ghosts of the past are alive and well!

I woke up at 4:15 this morning and was very surprised that I had a guy on my mind from my distant past.  Now I mean my way back there distant past.  My first boyfriend.  I was 17 years old and I thought the sun rose and set in that boy.  He took me to Joyland in Wichita one sunny afternoon.  We rode all the rides and when we got on the Roundup, my stomach had it's limit.  His name was Corky and he was so sweet and concerned about my welfare.  Throwing up on the Roundup was the high point of the day and we left soon after that.  We continued to for a while and then sort of drifted apart.  It was never a big romance, just a very comfortable relationship with some one with whom I could share my  hopes and dreams.

Years passed and I married and had a family.  I ended up in Garden City, Kansas.  When that marriage went south, I returned to Hutchinson.  There I met the second man in my life who would offer me comfort in a storm and ask nothing in return.  His name was Gib.  We never really dated so much as sort of hung out together.  He was a friend of my mom's.  He was also a cook and I was a waitress until I became a cook also.  He helped shop for Christmas Santa Claus gifts and helped put the things together on Christmas Eve.  He was engaged to a girl named Cheri, but though they lived together, they never married.  I never understood their relationship.  He and I were friends, but he and Cheri had something, and yet nothing.

The one thing both these guys and I had in common was that the relationships were purely platonic.  I never expected more and they never asked for more.  I can search the world over and never find 2 men that made such an impact on my life!  Ah, but hindsight is always clearer then foresight, isn't it?

Years passed and the AIDS epidemic reared it's ugly head.  Gib moved to California.  He died there.   I was in Pueblo by then.  Mother called and said Gib wanted to get together over Thanksgiving that year, but she was afraid.  I told her I could  and would love to come and see Gib.  I was not afraid.  I just wanted to see my old friend.  Plans were made, but he did not make it.  I know there was no funeral and he is in an unmarked grave.  I still miss him.  The very first panel on my AIDS Memorial Quilt is for Gilbert Fields.

I learned later that Corky had also passed.  He was also a statistic in the early stages of the epidemic.  Jimmy came later.  And Mark.  And Mike.  And a list that goes on and on and on.  I have always had a rapport with the gay community, even before I knew there was a gay community!  They have been my friends when I had no friends.  They held me up when I could have sunk beneath the waves.

I have no idea why these two guys are on my mind today, but there they are.  I just wanted to share with you, my readers, a small glimpse into my past so you can maybe understand why I am who I am today and why I do the things I do.  I guess I am trying to give back to the community that cared for me when I did not care for myself.

What a wonderful week it was!

Obamacare, commonly known among those in the know as "The Affordable Care Act,"  stands as is.  After a massacre in Charleston of 9 Blacks in a church, the Rebel flag has been removed from the flagpole at the Capital.  And discrimination for my gay comrades has ended and they are free to marry.  Imagine that!  I took up the banner of gay rights over 30 years ago, so this was a real victory to me.

Of course, with the SCOTUS ruling, comes the "Bible Thumpers."  Relax!  I am one myself.  I tout the Bible to anyone that will listen.  I preach love, understanding, forgiveness, acceptance, kindness, and truth.  But being on social media, there is always an opinion and a lot of links to prove a point.  So it upset me yesterday when a link was posted to "prove by the Bible" that gays can not only not marry, but as near as I can tell, not exist and will burn in hell!  To this I will hit the unfriend button every time.

I have lived and worked along side some of the sweetest people in the world who happen to be gay.  30 years ago, when I took up this banner, I knew there would be no turning back.  And I haven't.  My God made my gay friends just exactly as they are.  My God does not make mistakes.  The Old Testament is full of all kinds of things you can not do.  You can not eat shell fish, nor the cloven hoof, and if your brother dies without leaving any children you have to marry his wife and carry on his seed.  But that is the Old Testament.  All things are now new.

I was a care giver through the height of the AIDS epidemic and still volunteer with Southern Colorado AIDS Project (although it has a different  name now).  I was there when the Privacy Act was being implemented.  I was there to hold frail bodies as they left this world.  I was there when they thought AIDS could be caught by touching.  I was there as a shoulder to lean on or as a whipping post for someone lashing out at mans inhumanity to man.  I was there when the medicines were being introduced that have now changed the death sentence of AIDS to a manageble condition.  And through it all, the one group we could always count on for support of a financial nature or a shoulder to lean on when we were tired was the gay community.

The gay community that was called names because they were different.  Because a woman loved a woman or a man loved a man.  Hated in the name of love!  Does that sound like a Godly person to you?  "Judge not lest ye be the judge."  I am proud to be who I am, a straight woman with a whole lot of gay friends.  I am proud to set beside my gay friend in church because I know if I need something, he will be there!

So today I will go worship my God.  My God who accepts me as I am.  My God who loves all people and I will thank the Surpreme Court Of The United States for being unbiased and showing me that , yes there is justice in this world and right does sometimes win.

Welcome to Pueblo, Colorado, Westboro Baptist Church!!

Here is the front of the Pueblo County Courthouse where Bo Ortiz foams at the mouth to  marry fag dogs!!!

It was snowing like the dickens when I left the house this morning to attend the counter rally at the court house.  Like a whole bunch of other people, it was a call that could not go unanswered.  When it was time to  have the speakers (I was included in that venue) we all moved inside.  I am anxiously awaiting a head count. I have no idea how many people were there, but when we went to walk around the court house we marched 3-4 abreast and covered the whole area around the courthouse.

Westboro had 6.  We were not allowed to go that direction.  The told us to move right along, but did let me point my camera in the direction of the group.  That might be one on the other side of the fence.  Now, you all know I am a pacifist, so I would have been very kind to them, but since I did not see any, I could not "spread the love".

".

This is my son Bret and Misha, his boss who owns Heritage Organics.  I am on the end wearing my "cicil disobedience shirt, other wise known as a "tie dye."

Here is Janet Altmann and myself being very, very good.

But if you want to know what a show of solidarity looks like, please enjoy these pictures.

 They were even hanging from the balcony around the rotunda!

Westboro did not linger long!  All in all, it was sure worth the trip onto town during a blinding blizzard.  I am going to pop this over on youtube and will put a link on here.  I am, in the meantime counting this as a great day.  

And if you missed my speech, here it is in it's entirety!

The gay rights movement in the US is often traced to June 27, 1969, in New York City, when police raided a Greenwich Village bar, the Stonewall Inn, and bar patrons rebelled in protest. Seven years later, in 1976, in Dade County, Florida, Anita Bryant led the first religious campaign against gay rights.
In Colorado an amendment was placed on the ballot in 1992 by a religious group centered in Colorado Springs. 
Amendment 2 reads as follows:
"Neither the State of Colorado, through any of its branches or departments, nor any of its agencies, political subdivisions, municipalities or school districts, shall enact, adopt or enforce any statute, regulation, ordinance or policy whereby homosexual, lesbian, or bisexual orientation, conduct, practices or relationships shall constitute or otherwise be the basis of, or entitle any person or class of persons to have or claim any minority status, quota preferences, protected status or claim of discrimination. This Section of the [Colorado] Constitution shall be self-executing."
At that time there were 2 little gay guys in Pueblo, Colorado.  Fortunately there were also two or 3 mothers and a friend who had lost a friend to AIDS in a loosely held group known as PFLAG.  I found them in 1990 when they were meeting in the basement of the old Red Cross building on Pueblo Boulevard in an unmarked room to protect our identity.  Yep I was one of them.  We spoke out against Amendment 2, but in hushed tones.  We put up NO on 2 signs and they were promptly torn down.
The amendment was passed by a majority of Colorado voters in November 1992, and was to take effect on January 15, 1993. The American Civil Liberties Union, Lambda Legal Defense Fund, the cities of Boulder, Aspen, and Denver, and individual plaintiffs joined forces under the leadership of attorney Jean Dubofsky, a former Colorado Supreme Judicial Court judge, and filed a motion in Denver District Court seeking to enjoin the governor and state of Colorado from enforcing Amendment 2. On January 15, 1993, Judge Jeffrey Bayless granted a preliminary injunction, giving the plaintiffs the first victory in a legal struggle over the constitutionality of Amendment 2. That injunction was later made permanent, but was then appealed to the US Supreme Court.
Now SCEA members!  Listen up.  On the night of the election, when Amendment 2 passed with a clear majority a phone tree went into action and a business on Elizabeth Street opened for a gathering of probably 50-60 gay people.  Many of them wore “Don’t shoot!  I am really a black bear.”  Because a measure protecting the black bears had passed. 
Out of that meeting grew a need to protect our gay friends.  We knew we must let people know that gay existed and existed in Pueblo Colorado.  A group was formed at that time and christened with the name “Pueblo After 2.”  Our symbol was an upside down pink triangle.  We quietly infiltrated the straight world.  The pioneers in this movement were the 2 gay guys, Joe Roderick and our Beloved late David Hackenberry.  Thanks also to Donna, Carolyn, Warren, and the list goes on and on.  As gay people came out of the closet and awareness swept Pueblo and all of Colorado.  When amendment 2 was faded in the background we became politically active and needed a new name.  Up jumped Southern Colorado Equality Alliance.  From that came Out Front Youth Group, and other splinter groups that are now respected and do many good works.  I never thought I would live to see a gay pride parade, but now I actually participate.
We did not get where we are by violence, hatred or intimidating people.  Westboro Baptist Church would have us stoop to their level, but we will not.  We are equal citizens of this great country and we are treated as equals not because of a law, but because we are equal.  I thank Gilbert Ortiz for standing with our friends and family against the forces of evil.
SCEA, that is where you came from.  I was there.  I am a charter lifetime member of Pueblo After 2 and am supposed to get the newsletter from you, but you have forgotten about your roots.  So I just wanted to remind you.

http://youtu.be/hgpZCE6yhYw

A book sale is easier said then done!

PFLAG funds several  scholarships at PCC.  For many years we did it by hosting a spring yard sale.  Recently we have decided that book sales are the way to go and much less work.  See, all year Ross would gather stuff for the sale and until last year it was all stored in the basement at his condo.  Then my garage opened up and that sucker was filled to overflowing.  When the idea of book sale came up it seemed perfect.  The books would be gathered and stored on site at PCC where the sale would be held.  That was right up until somebody donated 80,000 books from the library of an estate.


 
And then my garage came into play again.  A big van backed up to the door and when it left it was empty.  Not so my garage.

The first thing I did was start repacking because a lot of these were in plastic containers that they wanted back.  I tried sorting, but I really got confused!  I did manage to get a box for Louis Lamore (?) and other authors that I remembered people asking for at the last book sale.  Oh, and the Harlequins, and some where I have a box for kids books and another one for cook books.  See all the boxes on the shelves?  These picture were taken after I had been working for over 3 weeks on this.  I plan on finishing up in the next couple weeks and I hope nobody asks me where anything is located!  See how neat?

And way back there in the corner I can see empty shelves!  It is my goal today to make a path back to those shelves so they can not be empty any more.  Wish me luck!  Oh, first I have to gather up some more boxes.

Should have taken a picture of my chair, fan, and box of Kleenex where I spend a lot of time crying!  Oh, yeah, and the plate with egg roll remains on it, my bowl of melted ice cream, a few chicken bones, and my bottle of water and Jack Daniels!  As soon as all the plastics are empty, I can take a break.  I have rented part of the garage to my son-in-law for storage so this will curb my ability to say "Oh, yeah!  I have a great big garage.  Bring all your stuff out here and poke it in there."  I am bad about that!  But, then again, if no one used it then it would just set empty and empty is not good either. 

 

 

So, for now it is off to church.  Next week I may give you a tour of my lower levels here in the house!  If you cringed at my garage, you will run screaming down the road at my basement, but Hey!  If I can live in it, you can look at it!

Have a good day and remember, 

 People who live in glass houses, should not throw stones!

 

 

 

 

 



Copied directly from MSN News in case you missed it on the PFLAG Blog.

Following her son's beating death 15 years ago, Judy Shepard has become a forceful voice for gay rights and a sort of mother figure for gay teens turned away by their own families.

NEW YORK — The mother who championed gay rights after her son was tied to a fence and beaten to death couldn't bear to sit through the play that has helped keep his memory alive for the nearly 15 years since his murder.
But this weekend, at the opening of a double-billing of Moises Kaufman's "The Laramie Project" and "The Laramie Project: Ten Years Later" at the Brooklyn Academy of Music, Judy Shepard — seated in an aisle seat to allow for an easy escape — soldiered through the entire five-hour production, which recalls the story of Matthew Shepard's death in 1998.
"I just really didn't feel I needed to watch it because I lived it. And so many of the scenes bring back such horrific memories. I've never felt comfortable crying in public," Shepard said just before the Saturday performance. "It's been 15 years. I should be able to do this now."
Shepard made it through with the help of hugs from well-wishers at the intermissions.
Kaufman, a playwright and director who leads the Tectonic Theater Project, recalled the Shepard murder as a watershed moment that helped create a generation of activists and energize "straight allies" to the cause of gay rights.
"All of a sudden we had an image, we had an event, that operated as a catalyst," said Kaufman, a Venezuelan native who lives in New York.
The original play was born from the question of why Shepard's murder resonated more than other hate crimes, Kaufman said. The play has been staged more than 1,000 times.
Ten years after Shepard's death, Kaufman and Tectonic returned to Laramie, Wyo., to produce an epilogue and to interview Russell Henderson and Aaron McKinney, who are serving life sentences for the murder.
Nine U.S. states have legalized same-sex marriage, and in March the U.S. Supreme Court will hear a challenge to the U.S. Defense of Marriage Act, which defines marriage under federal law as being between a man and a woman, and whether Proposition 8, a California ballot initiative that outlawed same-sex marriage, should be struck down.
ANATOMY OF A MURDER
Henderson and McKinney confessed to meeting the 21-year-old at a Laramie bar on the night of Oct. 6-7, pretending to be gay and offering him a ride home, with the intent to rob him. They grew enraged after Shepard made a sexual advance, they said, and took him to a desolate area in the outskirts of town, tied him to a fence and repeatedly struck him in the head with a handgun.
Shepard was close to death when he was discovered 18 hours later and he died in a Colorado hospital on Oct. 12. In her 2010 book, "The Meaning of Matthew," Judy Shepard wrote that while she was at her son's side, she was barely aware of the rallies by thousands of well-wishers in cities across the country.
Judy Shepard, who is soft-spoken and shy despite her years in the limelight, says she is a reluctant advocate. But she has become a forceful voice for gay rights and a sort of mother figure for gay teens turned away by their own families.
"Many of us feel that Judy is the mother we never had. But it goes way beyond that," Kaufman said. "It's a story of a person who was put in an untenable situation and got the skills to triumph in that situation."
Shepard, who still lives in Wyoming, heads the Matthew Shepard Foundation and has fought for gay rights in her home state and for a federal hate crimes bill, which President Barack Obama signed into law in 2009 with Shepard at his side.
"I did what people didn't expect me to do, which was not go away," she said. "As a straight person, I have a gravitas that someone in the gay community saying the things that I say would not have."
She said she has been frustrated that change in Wyoming, also the setting of the 2005 film "Brokeback Mountain," has come slowly. The state has no hate crimes law and this year the legislature rejected a gay marriage bill and a domestic partnership bill for same-sex couples.
Before the performance, a man who said he was about the same age as Matthew Shepard would be now tearfully thanked Shepard for her advocacy and said gay people "could not have had a better angel and a better mother."
Shepard's eyes also filled with tears, but she quickly regained her composure, saying: "This is what happens when you piss off somebody's mom."
 ——

Southern Colorado AIDS Project at Publo Pride Day!

Here I am on August 22, 2010 down on the HARP River  Walk at Pueblo Gay Pride Day.  These are a few of my friends from Southern Colorado AIDS Project.  On the left is the Reverend John Mark Hild of the Metropolitan Community Church here in Pueblo.  Directly behind me is Eric, a volunteer. The tall good looking guy there is Bill Sharpton.  He works for SCAP in the Colorado Springs office. If you recall the white panel on the AIDS Quilt with all the AA coins is his sister, Marty.

Gay Pride was quite a little event this year.  Makes me remember back to the beginning of my venture into the Gay Community in Pueblo.  I think it must have been about 1990 or 91 when I found PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays). There were 3 of us mothers and we met in the basement of the Red Cross Building on Pueblo Boulevard and prayed no one would know we were there.  We've come a long way, baby!

We now have a presence all over Pueblo in the form of youth groups, activist groups, clinics, support groups, World AIDS Day services, Southern Colordao Equality Alliance, and a scholarship program at the Community College.  I am sure there is much more, but this is good for now.  I am very proud to say the torch has been passed to a new generation and us old ladies that were there in the beginning can now set back and let the young'uns handle the load.  They have boundless energy and are all gung ho' on this and I am very glad.  This is one time we can truly enjoy the fruits of our labors.  Was not sure I would see this day 20 years ago.

Hey, have a good one today and every day, bearing in mind that Neil Armstrong made is own statement years ago when he said, "That is one step for man, and one giant step for mankind!"  Keep putting one foot in front of the other whether you are on the moon or in Pueblo, Colorado, or Podunk, Georgia.  Any step forward is something to be proud of and 2 other mothers and myself are proud of Pueblo, Colorado!!

AIDS Quilt #4

I hope I have all the ones on here.  This is one of the first quilts I made. I think it may actually be #2 because there are 2 panels on this one that measure 1' x 3' which tells me we were still in the planning and finalization stages. Shortly thereafter we (I) decided that for this to work they all had to be the same size.  Since the panels on the big quilt are 3' x 6',  which is the size of a grave in the cemetery, we should make these scale to 1/3.  So that works out well.

Steven Stiles

2/9/1956-1/23/1996

This is the white block up in the upper left corner.  It was made by his mother with much love. There is a family portrait and a picture of Steven with his cat. He loved Christmas so there is a beaded tree. His mother did a beautiful job on this.

Steven Kirk

6/9/1956

This is the large black and gold one on the left. He loved the theater and had a star named after him, "Aquila".  I made this at his mother's direction. She has since passed and I miss our little talks.

Gilbert Fields

1985

This was my very, very dear friend Gibby. He used to help me play Santa when I had no one but the kids. Granted, we did have a few drinks in the process, and almost cut our fingers off on a tin doll house once, but we had a great time and if I needed a brother, Gibby was there. He cooked and I waitressed at a place in Hutch called The Red Rooster.

 He moved out to California in 1984.  If you will notice, he passed early in the epidemic. He called us quite regularly until he got sick and nothing could be done. Then his friend kept in touch.  Then there was nothing. Gibby had died and his family chose not to tell anyone so we do not know the exact date of his death nor where he was (or if) he was buried. I do know this little laughing fellow had a very big part of who and where I am today and I send a big hug and kiss up to heaven where my friend Gibby is teaching the angels how to cook and my mother is giving him hell!

Gene Howery

8/18/1945-8/14/1995

This is the lower right with the howling coyote.  Another friend with no family to make a panel. We all went to Denver to the Gay Pride Parade in 1994, I believe.  The kids marched and we watched and waved. Gene and his partner walked with there dogs. Such a common ordinary thing to do in a world that was chaotic at the time.

Robert Tyree

4/25/1961-1/10/1991

This belongs to the son of the lady who started Southern Colorado AIDS Project field office in Pueblo, and I can not right now remember what year.  Shirley made this panel herself. It says Loved, Gone, Never Forgot. It also shows him setting by the Golden Gate Bridge. Another healing work of love by a mother left behind. They are together now.

Robert Martinez

4/26/1964-6/5/1991

Another one earlier in the epidemic. I did not know Robert, but I do know he loved music and sunsets. There is a picture of his that shows a beautiful sunset on this panel.

Ronnie Reagan

8/10/1956-2/18/1995

I made this for a friend of Ronnie's. It says "Sleep in peace, my little friend. Terry Atencio". Terry was a man in this town who took in anyone who needed a place to stay, sobered them up and sent them into the world a much better person.  He is also sadly missed, but has no panel as he does not belong on this quilt.

And that is it for this quilt.  You should know that all these panels are here because I first received permission from a family member to make them and add them. Since this is a public display that is shown several times a year there is no breach of confidentiality. I would never do that. When I started in this particular field I signed an affidavit that I would keep confidentiality and that is what I do.

I know sometimes I get a little long winded on these posts, especially when I am dealing with things that rip my heart out, like this series on the AIDS Memorial, but I just ask that you either bear with me, or click off and leave me here to weep alone.

Pueblo Aids Memorial Quilt Panel #1.

This is the first group of panels that were assembled for our quilt.  The blue one on the top left is for Craig.  Craig was a friend of mine. He loved Charlie Chaplin and if you look closely you will see Charlie on his panel. You will also see his little dog. He was born 6/6/60 and passed 3/12/94.

Below Craig is Shawn. Shawn was born 8/26/66 and passed 7/31/97. I did not know him very well, although I made this panel for him. He loved to cook and he loved the great outdoors and his panel reflects that.

The yellow one with the red heart belongs to David. He was born 8/25/47 and passed 8/23/89. This block was made by his sister. His sister has worked tirelessly to keep AIDS in the fore front of our minds and to always be sure there is an observance of World AIDS Day every year on December 1.

The one on the right with the eagle is for Randy.  He was a very good friend of my nephew.  He was born 5/15/63 and passed 10/1/91, which just happened to be my birthday.  He was in the Marine Corps. Seems ironic in the world before "Don't ask, don't tell" that one who held "Semper Fi" in highest esteem should die of AIDS.

Down below on the left is Frank.  He was born 6/12/62 and passed 11/13/95.  I did not know Frank, but I helped his brother make this panel.

The panel with the dove is for Steven. He was born 4/12/52 and passed 4/5/95.  I received a frantic call after there had been an article in the paper about the quilt from Steven's Aunt.  Would I please make a memorial for her nephew.  It says on the panel that he is missed by his sisters and mourned deeply by Aunt Kathy.  That is all I know about him.

The rainbow music panel belongs to Danny.  It was mde by his mother.  Below is a picture of the big panel that is in the big quilt in San Francisco.  A labor of love. He was born 5/26/60 and passed 10/12/93

The green one is for Father James.  He was born 5/6/37 and passed 10/25/89

So you see, there are young and old, gay and straight. There are brothers, fathers, nephews. The face of AIDS takes many different form, but one death is not diminished by a thousand deaths.  Each one is unique in it's own way and by the people who are left to mourn.  Please look on this post as an act of love  and watch for the next one.

The small part of Pueblo After 2 on the Pueblo Levee Project.

This is but a small part of the Pueblo Levee Mural Project. It was started in the 1970's as graffiti. The city fathers very quickly seen a way to make it work for the city as opposed to becoming a blight on the city.  It is and has been controlled by the city since that time. The Project is now over 3 miles long and is billed by the Guiness Book of World Records as the largest continuous painting in the world.

Then on November 3, 1992,  voters of the state of Colorado, passed the dreaded Amendment 2. By its pure design it was worded to repeal anti discrimination laws that had been passed by various entities to protect the rights of our gay/lesbian population.  I had at that point in time been working with the gay community as a member of PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays.) We had worked very hard trying to explain that this amendment wa sunconstitutional.  

 The night when the vote was announced we all went to a central gathering place and found out just how many gay people there were in our fair city. I knew my stats, but even I was amazed. On the same ballot was a question to protect black bears during mating season or some such thing. Many people wore signs that said "Don't shoot! I am really a black bear." But out of that evening came the realization that without organization and with out working together the gay community would always be an outcast segment of society. The grass roots organization was named Pueblo After 2, a very symbolic name. 

 If you look very carefully right there under the bridge you will see an upside down rainbow triangle. That was the symbol for Pueblo After 2.  As a friend to the community I was allowed to help! It was my job to bring the coffee and donuts.   I took this picture yesterday. The sign has weathered and faded, but it has been 18 years. That hardly seems possible, but I can subtract.    A lot has happened since that time.  Amendment 2 was struck down by the Supreme Court on May 20, 1996.  Pueblo After 2 is now Southern Colorado Equality Alliance.  As SCEA they are a very respected member of society. PFLAG and SCEA fund scholarships at the local community college.

As for me, I got old and do not do the political thing much any more, but you just never know where you might find me or why!!                                                      

Pueblo Levee Mural Project will be my next undertaking!

I was just flipping through the pages of my mind yesterday and I came up with my next undertaking on the old Blog. Many years ago I was involved in helping put an addition on the Pueblo Levee Mural. I shall revisit the site. I shall also give a brief history of the project. I am getting all excited just thinking about it. Now, I know you think it is a done deal, but there are facts that need to be researched, because this old gal has forgotten most of the particulars.

It is not enough to just put it out there and call it good. There are some facts that need to be accurate. Maybe someone out there can help me. What year was Pueblo After 2 established? What year was I President of PFLAG? Was I President of PFLAG or was I Vice President, or was it Secretary? I got a lot of work to do between now and then so I am going to get busy!

If you think of anything that can help me, please send me a note!!

From here to Madrid, Spain in 7 days!

This is Marvin the Martian. The little fellow left here last Thursday, March 11, 2010 and woke up this morning in his new home in Madrid, Spain. That is less than 6 days which is doing some moving if you just stop and think about that. Here is how Marvin the Martian Telephone came to make this journey.

I sell on eBay and Marvin was dropped off by a member of PFLAG which is the acronym for Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays. They have a rummage sale in the Spring to raise money for a scholarship fund they maintain at Pueblo Community College. It came to our attention that some items would bring more money if they had more exposure. We were right.

So Marvin came to my house. He was photographed on his best side in natural light and off he went to the eBay auction. Now new phones were selling on eBay at the time for $15.99, so imagine my surprise when I got my opening bid and it went up to $19.99. I was amazed when the auction closed at $31.00. Then came the most amazing post. I received a communication from a guy named Juan in Madrid, Spain telling me how happy he is to support our cause.

Postage to Madrid is by no means cheap, and the best I could do on this was $33.00. And then I check the progress today and find it has been delivered! I have sent things to Canada that are still in transit!  I have had people email me from Canada that apparently never get their package and when I trace it I find it has left the United States at which point it seems to be swallowed up in the big hole called Customs. But again I digress.

I just wanted to tell you how well the United States Post Office came through for me on this one. I sent a boat title to Denver 26 years ago and it has not gotten there yet, nor was it returned. Some letters have taken weeks to get there while the short check I mailed in anticipation of the deposit I would make the end of the week reached it's destination the next morning.

And so my hat is off to the USPO, Customs in Spain, Marvin and Juan! All worked like a well oiled machine for a story of success!