I have unleashed a monster on the world!

First I should tell you that the SWM of long ago who broke my heart and left me disillusioned is now operating under my umbrella in a far different capacity than he was last summer.  We are now friends.  As such we do not discuss politics, race, religion, Fox News, rearing of children, the welfare state, immigration, Sarah Palin, cooking, tattoos, Harley Davidson, the price of silver, and a myriad of subjects which are dealt with on a need to deal basis.  We spend a lot of time in quiet meditation.  I see him a couple times a week and I am helping him get his life organized.  Can not get mine on track, but doing pretty good getting him lined out. 

As friends we have a lot more in common and seem to have developed a mutual respect that was missing before.  I have found that he is interested in gardening.  Small draw back here is that he now realizes he is old and does not have time to wait for this stuff to get big.  So he has planted two  6 foot evergreens.  When he wanted Pampas grass he assumed he could buy it 6 feet tall and was crushed to be presented with 6 inch starts.  Of course the 4 inch tomato plants were a real blow to his expectations.  But like a true city farmer he went along with the game.  Four tomato plants and 2 peppers along with 2 hills of Zucchini soon graced his back yard.  He recalled his mother building a tent with three sticks for the tomatoes and was a little disappointed to find that the tomatoes needed to be 3 feet taller to reach the sticks.  That and the walk ways he built between the plants proved a little too much for me.  I had to take a break.

Next I taught him the benefit of making a list of things that need to be done and told him how gratifying it is to complete a task and then check it off or draw a line through it.  He is very good at making the list.  Very, very good.  I taught him on Tuesday about the list and Wednesday he called to read me his list.  It is now up to 38 items.  Nothing is checked off because he does not have time to do anything since he has to water his garden and make his list!  I am worried he may starve to death since I did not see anything about food on the list.

Now, lest you think I am completely heartless, I do have a long range plan for the little fellow.  Next week he and I are going to venture off to the the Senior Center and he will be enrolling in computer classes and I think he may play Chess.  I  will have to put this plan in place as I go.  See I noticed when I had lunch with Phyllis that there seemed to be a plethora of women in the lunch room.  Now I know the drill here.  If I were to be so inclined as to actively seek male companionship I would put me on a pretty little frock and kind of sashay along the boulevard there and sort of smile with my eyes a little down cast and some big strong boy would fall in step.  So, I know the game the girls are playing, I just need to make him aware of the part he should be playing.  How the boy survived this long in the world of women unscathed is beyond me.

He does not have an inquiring mind at all.  I know this because he wanted me to help him clean his stove.  So the first step was to do the self cleaning oven thing.  We disconnected the smoke alarm and opened all the windows and I went home and he went to his garage.  The next day I returned.  The boy almost had a stroke when I pulled the oven door off the hinges.  Then when I pulled the drawer on the bottom of the stove out he was astounded.  He had used the stove for 7 years and did not know either of those things could happen.  But he now has a very clean stove with the skillets neatly tucked away.  So I am grooming him for the candlelight dinners that await him and some lucky lady in the not to distant future.  I know he can cook so that is an advantage.

So next week I will throw him to the wolves, so to speak.  He has very high morals and a naivete that I find rather amusing.  Course we know how many times I have been around the block and I do not try to sugar coat any of it.  He will make some woman a very good companion and we are both acutely aware that it is not me.  The boy plays Classical music in his garage and his venture on the wild side is a little light jazz.  And he reads books with big words and tiny print by people I have never heard of before.  Way out of my comfort zone, but that does not make him a bad person. 

Ah, but for every  Jack there is a Jill.  We know that.  We just have to find the right Jill.  It is an undertaking that he has not yet put on his list, but he will! Just  click on this to see what I have planned!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WR2FvrU-NIM



 

I missed my vacation and I rather hate that.

I had planned a little trip the second week of May, but that did not transpire.  I was going to pop on down to Hutchinson and see the sisters and friends and then off to Longton to check on the daughter and her family and then out to West Plains, Missouri to see what old Vi is up to, and finish it off in Kansas City.  From there I follow I 70 back to home.  But I calculated the gas for that little jaunt and had a second thought that beat hell out of that first thought.  Now my little Ford gets very good gas mileage, but $350 seemed a bit out of reason.  That is without ever spending a night in a motel, eating a meal between visits, or, God forbid, car trouble.

So I opted to stay home.  I decided that since I did not go on vacation, I would do some of the things I had been putting off for tomorrow.  You know, like clean that wretched closet, dig out the tin shed,  do a little landscaping.  I reasoned that since I did not go on vacation and I planned to that this was free time and would be designated as such. If I were on vacation I could not be home and since I was not home I would be thinking what I could do if I were, so since I was home I would do what I thought I would do if I were not here!  I hope you agree with me there!

But alas! The best laid plans always go awry.  The closet sets exactly as it was on May 1 with the exception that one of the overburdened shelves in my lotion making storage closet collapsed.  A bottle of Peppermint oil managed to break it's lid on the way down.  Result of that is that I am constantly craving a mint!  Just glad it was the Peppermint and not the Patchouli!

Oh, and somewhere along the line I misplace 2 sets of keys and a jacket.  The first set holds a car key,  and a friends house key.  The second set holds my wedding ring, lock box key, my bedroom  closet key, post office box key, and something else that I forgot.  I strongly suspect that when I find one jacket I will find all the stuff that is in the pockets.  Today I will go get another car key made so that should bring me closer to finding the whole mess.

I think gas may have come down 3 or 4 cents.  If that happens I may get to go somewhere.  Granted it will be an abbreviated trip, but a trip none the less.  But for now, I will be meeting a friend for breakfast this morning and then back home then this afternoon another friend needs a ride to the cancer center and life goes on.  I need you all to send me good thoughts on those keys and I think I can find them.  In the meantime it shall remain another bump in my little trip up that yellow brick road!

Have a good day!  And remember to smile, it makes people wonder what you have been up to! 

This is a sad little sight here.

You can not see the third duck in this picture, but he is there.  See the white one? That is the Runner duck. The black duck is just that, a black and white duck.  But if you look very carefully on the left side down toward the tail on the Runner duck, you can see a little gray bump.  That is the Mallard.  Now this Mallard had a history, I am here to tell you.  First I want to give you a bit of background.  When Bret was 7 years old I had a friend, Steven Flowers, who lived and worked up in the mountains on a working ranch.  He had a duck who had babies.  Bret was dinging me about baby ducks so Steven brought me 4 of them.  They were Polanders, which is the domestic version of a Mallard.  Rather then explain all this, I just call them Mallards. 
Quickly my flock grew to 8.  Then some one in Colorado Springs needed to get rid of 13 ducks.  That is where the Black and White ones came from.  Then Bret wanted geese so I bought 3 of them.  Two ganders and one hen.  Then the two ganders died, one at the hands or rather wings of  a mean Muscovy Drake and the other to a neurological disorder culminating in the neighbor man wringing its neck.  Then Bret got tired of everything feathered and guess what!  So did Lyn.  At this time I had 1 female African Gray goose and 21 ducks.  Lyn brought me 6 geese and 6 ducks.  Then the geese reproduced and I ended up with 9 geese. Then the ducks came through again and the grand total last summer stood at 36 ducks and 9 geese.  Then the foxes came to call. By mid summer I was at 23 ducks and then we had 3 baby geese.  We wintered over with the 23 ducks dwindling to 15. Geese stayed at 12.  This Spring the foxes  became a real problem.  I watched my flock dwindle by 3 and 4 a week until at last I knew where this was headed.  There were 3 ducks left when I took this picture.  The next morning there were just the two.  The Runner and the Mallard. I called Lyn and Tim and they took the last 2 ducks to Pueblo West.  Now I have none.  What had been so much enjoyment for 12 years was now a memory.  I have seen the foxes over a period of time this Spring.  One gray, one small gray and one very big and beautiful Red Fox.  And while I sat here wringing my hands and watching my little friends being picked off,  I did not realize I had a very good friend across the field that was helping me out.  I learned just the other day that a man behind me who shall remain nameless had shot 7 foxes this season.  Can you imagine how fast the ducks would have disappeared if he had not been on guard?  I want to thank him for his dilegence.
Now, I still have 12 geese.  After the ducks were gone I heard a terrible noise out back.  The dogs and I ran out the door as did Amanda and the neighbor man.  My 12 geese were huddled at the end of the garden and when they saw me they came toward me and were jabbering away.  I do not understand what they were saying but as this plays out I think I can figure it out.  I think the fox hopped over the fence thinking he would have supper and the geese can be very loud and intimidating.  I think he decided the free meals here at my house were over. I sure hope so.  I know it is too late for the ducks, but I got a couple geese setting.  I do not know if you realize just how vigilant a goose is in guarding it's eggs, and it's babies, but I would not want to cross a mother goose under any conditions, and the ganders are worse! 
So while I will miss my helpless little ducks and mourn their loss I shall carry on with the goose population.  I do not think I will keep geese much longer and when Goosie, who is the lone female that I started with many years ago, is too old to go on living I will take the whole lot of them to the sale barn and just let the weeds grow rampant on the back acre.  It was a fun ride while it lasted.

Have a gander at these cupboard doors!

Well I had done a very informative blog on these cupboard doors and these people, but I see that the whole thing was lost and now only the pictures have turned up.  So let me go back and do this again.  See up there on top, you see the old fashioned clothes pins.  Those cupboard doors are in the laundry room.  Doc thought it fitting that the clothes pins be in the laundry room.

Then in the kitchen the knives end up as drawer handles.  Forks and spoons are used as door openers, what ever you call them.  I think this is very clever and I hate that I just passed up a chance to buy a bunch of junk silverware.

I guess I should begin by introducing you to these fine people.  This is Doc and his lovely wife Lynn.  The fellow in the background telling me how to take pictures is Sherman, a friend of mine.  They were all friends when they lived in Denver.  Doc and Lynn moved to the fair city of Ordway away from the hustle and bustle of the big city upon retirement into a very lovely older home with all the accruments that they possess.  You know, the good stuff, like steam heat radiators, real wood woodwork, stair case,  big windows and kitchen cabinets in need of a paint job and new hardware.  That is when Lynn remembered seeing silverware used for that.  And Doc took off with the idea.  Aren't they clever?

This is the first time I met these people, but they made me feel most welcome.  I met Doc first in his garage.  Oh, a real piece of work there!  First thing I saw was the picture of Hank Williams on the wall.  Then Buddy Holly  and of course the autographed picture of Candy Clark that every member of the British Motorcycle Association in this area has as a right of passage.  The pictures and the old motorcycles were what made me know that he and I were going to be very good friends.  And then I met his wife and the deal was sealed.  She weaves and spins and quilts and has two big dogs and what more could I ask for?

Ordway is a small town and very friendly.  So her and I walked up to the hotel wherein is located "Gertie's"  which is a little cafe.  We had the special which was a bowl of soup and a chicken salad sandwich.  They can call that a bowl, but I call it a canister.  Bet there was a quart of soup in that bowl.  It was very good.  I was reluctant to leave them at all, but since they did not invite me to sleep over I thought I should ride back.  I am pretty sure this may be my first trip down there, but it will not be the last.  Well, as long as they let me come back.

Here Foxie, Foxie, Foxie...Wait, not here!

Well, excitement in the back yard tonight.  It is raining here a little.  Not enough to do any good, just enough to make me think I should have a coat on over my shorts and what was I thinking any way.  So it was just almost to think about getting evening and I thought I should take a stroll out back.  Well first thing I see is Icarus, the calico cat  over setting in the Llama pen.  She does not usually do that, but I thought what the hey.  Then I noticed the brown Llama was on high alert, so I scanned the horizon and saw nothing.  Then the brown and white Llama started running.  I still saw nothing so I started on out to the duck house. 

Lordy, about that time something shot past me and I seen the Fox about 6 feet away running and scaling the back fence right in front of me.  He ran into the alfalfa field about 25 feet and then just stopped and set down and he and I engaged in a staring match.  I never had an encounter like that before.  This was very strange, so I grabbed my trusty cell phone and dialed Bret up and told him to bring his rifle and come out back.  As luck would have it, across the field is several houses so the rifle was out of play at that point.   Bret picked up a few rocks and chucked them at him, but he just looked at us and some of them were close.  So since I was getting wet and cold I decided to come in out of the rain. 

I guess what bothered me most is that he usually comes from the West through the Llama pen and then crosses the fence going South into the alfalfa before he gets to my property.  This time he came from the North,  over my West fence and then over the back fence heading South.  And he looked very ragged.  Not like the sleek fox I have been seeing.  Unless, of course, this is a different fox.  Good grief!  I think I have solved the mystery.  Nothing wrong with my fox, just this is not my fox.  Wonder how many of those things I have around here?

Have to worry about that tomorrow cause I am falling asleep here!  Good night all.

Dolly wants a new black and white purse!

Ah, Dolly decided she wanted a new purse, so I told her I could most definitely accomadate her in that area as I had just finished making several new ones and I was sure one had her name on it!  Dolly and Jerry attend the same church that I attend, or I should say I attend their church since they were there a long time before I showed up on Sundays. It does not take long to figure out just what I do in my spare time, cause I am happy to share that news.  I am now making purses which I shall offer for sale on eBay, but my friends get first choice and they get a break on the price.  And let me tell you, this little Dolly is just that!  She is the sweetest little person I think I have ever laid eyes on and her husband, Jerry, is absolutely devoted to her as you shall see in the last picture on this post. 

So here is Jerry telling her, "Sure, honey, it that is the one you want, cost is not object.  What ever you want is what I want."  Or something along that line.  You should know that they very recently celebrated an anniversary that took my breathe away.  Seems like 65 years or something like that, but look at her!  She is not old enough to have been married that long.  She is just as fresh and dewy eyed as she can be.

.

We had discussed whether the handles were long enough since some women do like to hook thier purse on their shoulder.  I do, but I expect to look for a shoulder bag.  So Jerry, since he is the one who usually carries Dolly's purse decided to model it.  So he did and he pronounced that it was just about perfect.

And since the deal is struck, here I am getting a check for my wares.  Ah, everyone fared well on this little transaction, although I did rather hate to part with that purse as it was one of my personal favorites.   But  if it must go to a new home, I am sure it will be happy at Jerry and Dolly's house.  Besides, I will probably see it again next Sunday!

 

Do I have class? I do not think so.

I used to think I had class.  May not have been high class, but I could get by and fit in with almost anyone any where.  Now I have had occasion to rethink the whole class thing.  I was having coffee with a friend the other day when I first began thinking maybe I was not on the same level as he was.  Granted he came from Denver via San Francisco via Philadelphia, drives a Lexus and actually owns a camel hair jacket of some sort or another.  Maybe it was a blazer.  We were discussing a play he had seen and as I sat there I watched him as he described having gone to the theater.  Theater.  I had at one time watched a movie.  The fact that I could not recall what it was about when it was over should have been the first clue.  "Shall we go to the theater?" is a far cry from "Want to catch a movie?" or "There is a play at the Impossible Players tonight".   Theater denotes that I will be wearing a dress of some sort and will behave in a civilized manner.  Movie would be jeans and tennies.  Play means we are going to eat before we go!

Just as "dinner engagement" is the direct opposite of "What's for supper?"  so "Brunch" is to "early lunch or late breakfast."  As I sat there engaged in this one sided conversation, my mind began to slowly point out the differences in our two worlds.  He talks in a quiet, well enunciated, sedate voice.  If something is funny, he laughs softly or smiles to himself.  I am more middle of the road, well more clear the hell and gone over there in the ditch.  I have been known to throw my head back and laugh very loudly if something is funny.  That is not done in polite society.  I usually kick my shoes off at the front door.  He wears his even when he is home alone. His hands are very soft and white.  His nails are manicured.  My hands are calloused. The majority of my nails are out of the quick, and no two are the same length.  His hair is pulled back and I think he just got in from the stylist.  No two hairs in my head go the same direction.  He will open the door for me and all I have to do is stand  and smile at him, but I don't feel like playing the game today.  I am out of there.

Now I should make a note here that this was not our first cup of coffee.  We had, in fact been to lunch a couple times and gone for a drive in the mountains.  He seemed to have the sense of humor that is necessary to me.  He is financially secure,  which is also important.  This was not my first rodeo, but it may have been his.  Remember when I said I was going to do the dating thing this year?  Well, this was  a feeble attempt at getting started on that road.  So in my typical fashion I have interviewed and discarded one of the male species.  I have decided that since I really do not care if I have one in my life on a permanent basis that I can afford to be very picky.  I am just afraid that by being a woman who does not care if she has a man, it is like waving a red flag at one of them. 

So, while this particular SWM and I had several good days over a three week period together I fear that this is not the one for me.  Oh, I fully intend to "see" him on occasion and we will talk on the phone from time to time.  He is a very interesting man, but way out of my comfort level for someone I want to introduce to my kids.  I am pretty sure he is not the one that will bait my hook when we go fishing, if we were to go fishing.  Doesn't strike me as anyone who could gut a fish either.  Although in all fairness he did listen attentively while I described the process to him.  I know he was attentive, because he did not blink one time.  Course shock has much the same reaction.  Hmmmmmmmmmmm?

So back to the drawing board for the dating thing.