The Golden Years? My dying a**!

Let me see.  To bed at 9:00.  Awake at 2:00 AM to pee.  Back to bed to contemplate the fate of the world.  Doze off.  Up again at 4:00 to guess what? Back to bed to contemplate actually getting up and getting an early start on the day.  Oh, hell yes.  Like I am so busy I need to get up that early.  Sadly one of these mornings I will not even get up and who is going to know?  Oh, yeah, the dogs and that damn cat who have to eat several meals a day all home cooked and chuck full of fresh vegetables.  So at 5:00 I give it up as a lost cause and give the animals their treats.

Not that my animals are spoiled, but they need a treat for going to bed and a treat for getting up.  They also require treats throughout the day for simply going out to the bathroom, coming in after going out to the bathroom, for helping me let the geese either out or in, for staying home while I go to the store, or barking at the UPS man, or the trash man, or the airplane going over.  But this post is not about my spoiled rotten animals.  It is about my golden years and what a friggin' joke they are.

Gone are the days when I could actually cut my own toenails.  Gone are the days when my yard was always mowed and the roses were blooming and the weeds were under control.  Gone are the days when the car was clean and my floor was swept and the sink clear of dishes.  Gone are the days when I really gave a shit about anything.  My bones are stiff, my joints creek and I can not hear what you are mumbling about over there.

I have had some pretty sad days in my life, but the saddest one of all was about 2 weeks after my husband had passed and I was standing and looking at his picture on the wall and it dawned on me that I would never again be held by a man who loved me completely.  I would never be able to just turn off the stove and go out to eat because he just wanted to take me. 
No more fishing trips. 
No more running up to Cripple Creek.
No more peanut shells on the floor.
No more heated debates over politics.
No more watching me mow the grass.
No more walking up behind me and putting his arms around me and laying his head on my back.
No more anything.

I did start dating, but the first guy died.  The second one told me, "I always felt like I was standing in Kenny's shadow."  As it turned out, he probably was.  Mother always told me that divorces were easy, because there was usually hard feelings on both parts.  But when the partner dies, they take on sainthood.  You forget the little things that irritated you and the partner is remembered as perfect.
Mother was so wise. 

I miss sharing happy times.  I miss sharing sad times.  I miss sharing little victories I win.  I miss showing him what I did down in the sewing room and I miss cooking for him.  And I miss setting in the front yard with the animals and watching the world go by.  I miss him.

Well, I need to go down one level and pick up the mouse body.  Thanks, Icarus.  I really have nothing planned for today, but I know I have to get started on my day.  Put my memories away and mark another day off the calendar.

All I can say, is have a nice day and enjoy what you have while it is there to be enjoyed.  Matter while you can, because time is fleeting.  Time and tide wait for no man.

Hand washing dishes may be an art!

I like to fill the sink with dirty dishes and then run it full of warm/hot water and put in a squirt of Ivory .  I can then plunge my hands into that and look out my back window at my domain while I wash the dishes, rinse them and put them in the drainer.  But my mind is never still and this morning it flashed back to Plevna and I heard Mrs. Crawford explaining the fine art of washing dishes correctly.

"Be sure that all the dishes are scraped and piled before you begin.  You will pile them in the order they are to be washed.  Glassware first, then silver, then plates, followed by the cooking utensils.  Each item will be rinsed in your tub of very hot water."

"Some times a bit of food will be stubborn and not come off when you whisk it with your dish cloth.  Do not, I repeat, DO NOT attempt to remove it with your finger nail.  Your hands are in the water and the nail is soft and you do not want to do damage to the nail. There is a wire scratcher that comes in handy for removal of stubborn things that do not want to be removed.  You will want to keep your hands lovely and soft for your husband, so when you are finished with the dishes and the sink is clean and dry, apply a little lotion and rub in in well."

Do I need to interject here that I failed Home Economics under the able tuteledge of Mrs. Crawford?  Now when I say failed I do not mean C or D but a big Red F.

I can still see her in my minds eye standing in the home economics room in her skirt and jacket with every hair in place pointing to the sink and the dish drainer as if they were the most important items on earth.  I actually grew up believing that man was superior and I must do all I could to please one of these creatures if I ever was lucky enough to catch one.  I had a helluva lot to learn back in those days!

At the end of the semester my grandma passed away and I was returned to Nickerson and enrolled in Home Economics where Miss Irvin was my teacher.  Here I attempted to learn how to make a simple dress.  As I recall mother bought me the required pattern in the size I needed and cotton fabric that was white with small blue flowers.  And thus that exercise I futility began.  We measured each other to get the proper measurements.  And then it was time to cut the pattern and pin the darts for the chest area.  Well, until I was 16 years old, I never had a sign of a boob, so darts were pretty well wasted on me, but nonetheless, there would be darts because as sure as there was a God in heaven, I would develop before that dress wore out!  Not sure that happened though.

After 4 1/2 months of cutting, ripping, stitching, and crying, the dress was finished.  The darts in the chest were perfect, but there was nothing there to hold them out for the world to see.  My sewing career was finished and Miss Irvin gave me a final grade.  Seems I had been a very difficult student.  I had not listened and I was disrespectful with all that crying.  You guessed it.  A big RED F.

Now, after a full year of schooling on how to cook, clean and sew for my man, I walked away empty handed!  My life was over as far as my mother was concerned.  I would never catch a man.  Even grandma kept telling me things like "Where spider webs grow, no beau ever goes."  The way to a man's heart is through his stomach."  And more crap like that. 

So I finished high school and began life in the real world.  My first marriage lasted 10 years and produced 5 kids.  After a string of husbands I finally found one that understood all I needed was stability.  I do not think my cleaning and cooking skills were ever on any of the divorce papers. 

What is the most amazing part of this whole thing is that I am now an excellent seamstress.  I have a sewing room to die for and am the proud owner of 5 sergers,  5 sewing machines, a machine quilter and a 6 needle embroidery machine, all of which make me money. 

I raised my kids on money I made as a short order cook, a dinner cook, a caterer, and personal orders as needed.  I baked and  decorated wedding cakes while I was at the Red Carpet.

Sorry, Mrs. Crawford and Miss Irvin!  I know you tried, but I am just one of those people that have to learn the hard way.

Isn't it amazing how I can get off track?  Guess I was not meant to be a writer.  Oh, wait a minute!  I am a writer!!

R-E-S-P-E-C-T spells what?

As I zero in on the end of my journey, I am beginning to get pretty excited about the next mile or so.  I look around at my world and wonder what in the hell happened.  All of my life I have been taught and knew as a fundamental law that my elders were to be respected.  And the elder they were the more respect they were due.  My mother worked all her life to give me life.  I owed her respect for that if for no other reason.  My father did not work, but I still respected him for the simple reason he was my father.  When I was young, that was my world.  I would never have dreamed that the day would come when I would watch young people elbow in ahead of me in a line at the grocery store.  If someone opens a door I am planning to go through I fully expect to walk through it, not be knocked out of the way by some snot nosed kid as he passes me on his way in or out.

Seems like this all pretty well started back in the '60's when Vietnam was in full swing.  It was then that people began to dig into our government and find secrets that were being hidden.  I can remember hearing Vietnam when I was a mother with only 4 kids back in 1965.  How long it lasted is beyond me because when I moved to Colorado in 1973 they were publishing the death count on the news every day.  Jane Fonda was making waves and flags were burning.  The government lost all credibility.  From Richard Nixon and Watergate to  Ted Kennedy and Chappaquiddick our leaders turned out to be mortal men.  Televangelists were not immune either.  Bobby and Tammy Faye Baker and their falling empire led to Jimmy Swaggert and and a host of others.  Seems like every one had a secret to hide.  It has not stopped.  The few honest politicians are few and far between and have given rise to the saying, "You can send an honest man to Washington, but you can't get him back."

Seems like the rich get richer and the poor get poorer.  Honesty does not count for anything any more.  An honest day's work for an honest day's pay is non-existent.  We used to get hand me downs from the people on the other side of town, but now Goodwill, Thrift Shops, Consignment Shops are the norm.  Those and yard sales.  Days of sewing our own clothes are history.  Fabric to sew a garment costs more than going to Walmart and buying  something that was made in Tiawan or China.  That is sad.

The information super highway lets us watch the news as it is happening.  That really came across when we were bombing Baghdad.  The rockets red glare has a whole new meaning.  Schools will soon be obsolete because kids are blessed with a smart phone as soon as they can grasp an object.  Want to know something, just type in your question and the answer will appear.  Is this a good thing?  I don't think so, but no one asked me.

So I am going to work on my bucket list and let the world go by at the speed of light.  I will still respect my elders, though they are getting harder to find as I get older.  Guess I am just getting soured on life as I miss the days when deals were sealed with a hand shake and lawyers were used to write your will.  For now I am going to set on my deck out back and look for the Blue Moon which is supposed to be very bright.  At least the moon is still something I can count on seeing.

Lou's sweat shop

There is a first time for everything and boredom got the better of me tonight, so I made this slide show and uploaded it to youtube.  Hell, I may be in the movie business as soon as I figure out how to get sounds on here!

I am getting behind here!

Well, I was just checking my stats and happened to notice that I have not been on here for over a week!  That will never do.  Do not think that these little hands have been idle, because they have not!  My floors are laid and the contents are slowly making their way back into their respective positions.   They do not do this alone, you know!  And the little cold snap we have endured for God only knows how long has the goose tank frozen completely solid.  To the untrained goose herder, it sounds simple, but to the geese it is a crucial matter.  They need water to survive and when the temperature continues to hover below 32 degrees, any water I carry out there freezes.  This means I have to do it several times a day.  This is starting to take a toll on the back that was already headed out the door.
And eBay continues to be a thriving place in my world.  Granted I do not sell as much as Eric or other friends, but I do manage to send out a package or two every day.  That sounds simple, huh?  The package usually contains a seed catcher, lotion, or something that I have made or will need to make to order before it can get into the package.  Right now I am finishing up a big order for my new friend in Alabama. 
Well, that is not quite true.  Right now I am trying to figure out how I sent this post off into cyber world and got it back mostly gone.  If you ever run into anyone who thinks they are smarter than a computer and have Windows 8 all figured out, you just let me know, because I want to meet that person.  No one is smarter than this computer!
And there is that book I am working on.  Well, two of them actually.  I have put Chapter One...The Antlions Den on hold while I do the fantasy novel of what life would have been had I met Sherman earlier in life.  That is entitled Long ago and Not Very Far Away.  It can be found at http://delilahsdatingdilemma.blogspot.com/ .
Also life creeps in and maybe a grand kid comes by, or a step daughter, or the loom calls me to weave, or meet the kids for lunch, or Daisy wants to go to the vet, or Elvira needs groomed, and also three is that Weavers Guild meeting, lunch with a friend, grocery shopping or a myriad of other things that need my attention.
The next post will be the luncheon I had with the Catholic Sisters and the ministers from Colorado Springs.  I will have to do that on the downstairs computer, because I have not found a slot on this computer to put my camera card in so I can have pictures.  Always something here in the real world, isn't it?
Off to sew.

First Congregational Church Annual Craft Bazaar.

Well yesterday was the day and off I toodled to the annual Craft and Bake Sale.   And a good time was had by all as you can see in the slide show.  I saw lots of old friends  and made a few new ones.  I sold several copies of my book.  Made a date to meet a couple guys at the library Tuesday evening.  And I made some money.  That is always the high light of my day!
Oh, and I sold a couple purses.  I ate biscuits and gravy, and nachoes, and a big baked potato.  Drank 2 cups of cappachino and one Coke.
I finished up the craft sale by modeling the vintage apron that I had just finished a few days before.  I think I will sell it on eBay cause that is what I like to do.
After the sale I loaded up the car and drove over to the Anita Goodesign show that Sprinkles was putting on over at the Prysbeterian Church on University Circle.  Amanda was working there and Bret was over on Eagleridge running the shop, so I did not get to see him. 
Then I stopped by the Vail to see how the girls were doing at the Handweavers Guild sale.  But more on that later today because I have to work there from 2-6. 
I finally drifted home and the dogs were very happy to see me.  I shut up the geese, set the clocks back an hour, ate a bowl of cereal, answered a few emails and then off to bed with me!  Slept the sleep of the innocents and woke up this morning at 3:10.  I hate time changes and it is probably a very good thing that I live alone!
So now I am off to bigger and better things.  Will try to report in tonight with a slide show from the Vail Hotel.  For now it is off to chores, shower and then to church in that order.
 

A day in the life of a madwoman!!

5:15 AM Decide I might as well get up since I can't sleep anyway.
5:16 AM Turn on computer.
5:30 AM Get my first cup of coffee.
5:36 AM Breakfast consisting of 1/4 cup glucosomine for the joints, 2 Tablespoons flax seed for the inner workings, toast with 9 grains and 4 kinds of nuts for the carbs, butter cause I like it, 2 eggs for protein, and milk for the bones.
5:40 AM Into the bathroom for my first round of DMSO (Liniment) on the right hip and right knee. 
5:41 AM Brushing of the teeth (amist much gagging and such).
5:42 AM To the computer and boot up AOL.  (You may notice I skipped the one part in the bathroom about the relieving of myself and that would be because I was up half the night taking care of that little chore.  Seems my bladder works best when I am in a prone position!)
5:44 AM Open email and check for sales on eBay.  Print out paypal payments and then go to personal emails.  Two sentence answers to those.
5:54 AM Check the downstairs for anything I forgot to finish last night.
5:55 AM Crank up the wii exercise thingy.  Do the body test thing.  I have lost 3.5 pounds since yesterday and appear to be 48 years old according to the wii test.
6:05 AM Back to the computer to see if anyone read my blogs last night while I was sleeping.  Yes!
6:07 AM Take pictures and list one Anita Goodesign CD. Check to see how the other auction is doing and how much I now owe ebay for thier magnamously helping me in my endeavor.
6:40 AM Notice there is a bird dropping on the INSIDE of my window.  I do a cursory look on this level and find no feathers or other signs of a bird in distress.  No signs of that damn cat either.  I make a post it note for the lower part of the computer screen reminding myself that if I smell a strange odor in the next few days that there is no doubt a bird body somewhere.  I make a mental note to myself to kill that damn cat when I find it.
7:35 AM Wander out back to let out the geese and start the water in the tank so it will overflow and make them a puddle which they like.  While I am out there I fill the feeder and make a note that I need to go by Big R and buy three more bags on Tuesday.  It is cheaper on the second Tuesday, but I never seem to run out and God forbid I buy anything ahead.  Every time I have to wrestle those 50 bags of feed around I make a mental note to myself that I need to get married again.  First I will need to tear the post it note off the bottom of the microwave oven reminding me not to get married again.
8:37 AM Decide I have had way to much coffee this morning and I need to do a blog.  And now it may be done since I need to get in the shower and get ready for church. 

Thank heaven for church (I can grab a much needed nap!) as it is the one constant in my hectic little life.  When I get home, after meeting Ross and consulting with him about some electronics over on Howard, I am going to start sawing away at the apple tree out front.  Seems when I planted it I managed to plant it right over the sewer line and now it is running roots into the line and plugging it up. 
So there you have it in a nutshell.  My life may not be organized and it may not seem like much to you, but it is my life and I would not have it any other way!
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This is the novel I have for sale on Amazon.  Do not be confused by the title.  Chapter One simply means this is my first book.  There may never be another, or there may be many more.  I am very proud of this endeavor and guarantee you will enjoy the book in it's enirety.   Lou Mercer

From the back cover

Chapter One...Loose Ends
Lou Mercer

Meg Parker led a simple life.  She was a widow of three years and lived on a chicken farm at the foot of the mighty Rockie Mountains.  Life was good and her little store on eBay made her extra spending money.  But snow and wildlife were not the only things lurking in the forest above her house.  Nor did it stay in the forest for long.

Marshall Purcell came home a wounded veteran from vietnam.  He still had his dreams, but they were of an incestuous past that threatened to consume him.

When Meg and Marshall met it seemed an inconsequential meeting, but it changed both their lives forever.  And change is not always a good thing.

This is adult fiction at its best without all the sex.  Well, maybe just a little bit. 

About the author.  Lou Mercer was born in Nickerson, Kansas. She came to Pueblo, Colorado in 1977 and is now a product of the majestic Rockie Mountains

6 degrees and one of us is rising!

I am setting here in my banana belt enjoying a lovely 6 degree morning.  Yesterday at 7:30 AM I took Elvira in to the beauty shop.  Noticed a few flakes.  Dropped the dog off and headed home in a blinding blizzard.  9:10 Doug called to say she was ready, but not to hurry cause it was supposed to stop at 9:00.  Hmmmmm.  By the time I drove back into town through the same blinding blizzard the snow was about 4 inches deep.  And when it finally got around to slowing down, this would be the view out my office window.  It was anywhere from 4-8 inches depending on where you stuck the ruler in the snow at. 

By 2 o'clock  the snow had stopped.  I had to run over to the highway and drop off some packages.  At that point the roads were snow covered and it was slushy. 2 hours later I walked up to get the mail and South Road was clear.  Patty came in about 6:00 and arrived on a sheet of ice. 

Now my point is this, where is that damn groundhog when I need him.  I had been setting here on Wednesday plotting the tilling of the garden and planting of the seeds.  Then the next day I am digging out the snow shovel again.  As I recall, back home, it was a simple matter of watching and when things started popping up, it was time to plant.  We used to start tomato seeds inside in flats in January and when planting time came we had big nice plants ready to stick in the ground. Such is not the case here in Colorado. 

Remember when they had a car advertisement that said "Zero to 60 in 9.9!"  That seems to be the motto here in Colorado only just reverse it.  Now I see that the 7 day out look is calling for this to happen again on Tuesday.  Want to come shovel for me?

When Amy was here nary a flake fell.  Wait, yes it did, but not much.  What happens in Colorado is almost comical.  See it drops down to exactly 32 degrees.  Then it starts to rain and it drops another 1/2 degree.  This causes snow flakes that are about 4 inches across.  Looks like a bunch of white feathers coming down.  These, of course, pile up very quickly.  So we have a very deep snow going on until it stops and the temperature shoots up to 32.5 degrees and it immediately starts to sink into itself since snow flakes are very delicate.  This is my scientific description, by the way.

Well, kiddies, I got up this morning with a headache, so I am going to cut this short, go deal with my eBay stuff, print a label and start my day.  We are off to an apron class this afternoon.  Not because I want to, but because Patty wants to and I do not think Garden City is conducive to new sewers.  So tomorrow I will try to post about our class, unless of course, I get side tracked which has been known to happen.

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Emily Carter Event

Ok, this is what I did yesterday. I will not go into a lot of detail as this slide show has all the information on each picture and you can pause it and I made it big. Oh, I am so good!! I do want to say up front that these pictures were taken at Sprinkle Sewing Center in Pueblo, Colorado. It is located at 1740 Eagleridge Blvd. #120. You will be met at the door by Cosmo, the actual ruler of the domain. Lovely little white dog who would be most appreciative if you would bring him a small treat. Course Jerry does not appreciate that much as Cosmo may lose his waistline! For years and years I thought a serger was only good for finishing the edges of material, but I have been brought kicking and screaming into the new age of sergers. Emily Carter has lived in Pueblo for many years. She was actually the first person to work for Jerry when he opened Sprinkles God only knows how long ago. (Side note here. The mark of a good journalist is that she will have all her facts at hand before she begins to write. She will not call upon God as a resource!) That being said Emily is the Babylock Representative and Educator. Did you get a good look at that stuff she made on her serger! Until I set down to this serger in this class with Emily at the helm I had not a clue. And the very saddest part is that I own 3 sergers. And one of them is the evolve which is air thread and does everything the newest one does except the Wave Stitch. 5 needle capabilities. Cover stitch. Everything! And I use it to serger around the edge of seed catchers. Paid over $1000 for it and use it like a $100 piece of crap! I should be horse whipped. So any way, Emily is one of the most knowledgeable people I have come across and she taught me a lot, which people have been trying to do for years, and with no luck. See, most of it I think I already know. But, then here came Emily to wake me up. And note the little lady named Wyna. She was right across from me and such a delight. Well, everyone was, but her and I clicked. She used to live in New York and I just love people from the East...Well, Back East, I should say. They tend to be a little more refined than me. So Wyna, here is my email. Keep in touch! loumercer3@aol.com Now, enjoy the show!

When Bret was little........

This is Bret now.  Or at least it was several months ago.  Just every time he comes or goes I remember when he was little.  That was the good old days.  That was when I actually mattered for something besides the occasional  $20 for gas request.  Bret had been a regular visitor in our home since his birth.  As the closest grand son he was also most frequent.  He used to say cute things, like "Grandma!  Let me in! I have too many hands."  "oh, it is such a 'boo-fi-ul' day".  I babysat him as he got older and potty trained the little fellow and taught him to ride a bike.  He would spend weeks at a time with us especially after his mom and dad separated and she remarried.  When he came up for adoption we were the obvious choice.

When Kenny quizzed him about who would be his grandpa if we adopted him, he thought about it for a while and then announced, "Why, I would be my own grandpa!"  And after the adoption he immediately began calling me "mom" and continued calling Kenny "grandpa".  Kenny finally had to explain to him that we had to both be "grandma and grandpa" or "mom and dad."  He opted for the mom and dad one.

His first official act when he came to live with us was to shave off his eyebrow along with the mole over that eye.  Second was to throw a fit in the Library that almost landed me in jail for child abuse when I grabbed his young self up and loaded him in the car and had Shelly and Chris set on him till we got home. They called it attachment disorder and testing the limits and a few other things.  I called it being a spoiled rotten little brat.

Like I said,  he was so cute.  I have pictures of him and the neighbor kid (also an adopted grandson) learning to crawl toward each other,  running naked through the sprinklers, playing "dogs".  They broke the windows in the garage, made a general mess of everything they touched, but they never went to school together.  Skeeter went to town school and Bret caught the bus.

Now school was a complete waste of time for this kid.  I spent more time at the school than he did.  He never turned in homework and there was never a teacher who seemed to think it mattered until the end of the grading period and there were no numbers in his columns.  In the Fourth  grade he made the merit roll.  You could of knocked me over with a feather!  First and only time he ever bothered with academia!  I put him in the Church School in town and he did some better, but once again I was at the school more than he was.  I actually bought the curriculum and got him through the Seventh grade here at home.  I know he studied that 3 months.  His teachers just loved him and he loved them.  It was the whole school thing. Even tried the online school.  Nothing.

So now here he is working at Sprinkles Sewing Center as a certified Technician.  Everybody loves him and he does a really good job, I think.  At least Jerry and Cathy say so.  Sprinkles just opened a shop in Canon City and he and Amanda have added responsibilities there.   Amanda is his girlfriend and she works there also.   They are getting ready to move into their own home.  So, I guess I am not a complete failure since he did survive childhood.  And I survived his childhood.  We lost Kenny when Bret was 12 so that was hard.  Big adjustment for both of us.

As I write this he is in the shower and has been for over 20 minutes.  I am going to have hot water again when he moves out!  That and the light bill is going to plummet.  They buy most of their own food so that is no biggie there.  They do not eat like I eat.  In all fairness, though, Amanda did tell me that she will start eating healthy when she turns 20 so there is hope.  They are taking the deep fat fryer when they move.   

So now you have met 5 of my 6 kids. 

Oh, and he just turned off the water, so all the hot must be gone!  Glad we got rid of that!

I am going to do my sisters next if they will let me.  Course you have already met and are very familiar with Mary.  That just leaves Donna and Dorothy.  I will ask them and let you know!